Friday, November 09, 2007

Is This Happening Everywhere?


I was shocked when an NBA referee was fired for being involved in gambling/point shaving.

That's bad enough, but when compared to the world of tennis, it is really quite tame.

And no, I can't believe I typed that last sentence. But tennis is a sport that has become far seedier than boxing ever was.

In the past month the tennis world has rocked us all with these revelations:
- Accusations of match fixing.
- A major women's player is a cokehead (errrrrrrr- allegedly.)

I long for the good old days.

Look, I know John McEnroe was a brat, but I don't think he ever poisoned anybody.

POISONING! ARE YOU FREAKING KIDDING ME?!!!

Since when did tennis become more entertaining to follow than the WWE?

These story lines are much better than anything I'm following in sports presently, even pro wrestling.

Which makes me wonder- when is Roger Federer going to club a line judge, or an opponent, in the back with a folding chair?

Or why not have Andy Roddick blast his next opponent in the eyes with talc or salt during the middle of his next match?

This is what tennis has become?

People used to make movies about the dark side of boxing. I guess that's now over, now that tennis has officially crawled under a rock.

They'll have to remake "On The Waterfront" and put Terry Malloy in tennis shorts and move the location to Wimbledon.

"The Champ" will now end with Billy Flynn being pummelled to death in a hailstorm of heavier than regulation tennis balls during the US Open.

I can't wait to hear about what's really going on behind the scenes in the world of the PGA. It's awfully quiet over there. Maybe someone is involved in an international drug ring. Or smuggling stolen jewels. Or kidnapping. Or...murder.

That's the only thing that will make me forget the sordid world of professional tennis.

2 comments:

TK said...

Don't you think that it would have been extremely OBVIOUS if Martina was high on cocaine while playing??? I mean it would have been a speed match, right? ;)

Scottius Maximus said...

TK!

It would only be a "speed" match if she'd been positive for "crank"- not cocaine.

In my experience, I have found it is virtually impossible for there to be a false positive drug test.

I think she did it and got caught. And her retirement and total lack of fight puts the final nail in the coffin.

If you're wrongly accused of something, it's a street fight until your name is cleared.