Saturday, March 31, 2007

Friday, March 30, 2007

I Love The '80s

In the spirit of yesterday's post...




we now have word of a Saturday marathon...




of another 1980s classic...




to be shown on ESPN Classic...



this Saturday March 31st...



starting at 12 PM CDT...




until 6 PM CDT...




Ladies and Gentleman...







AMERICAN GLADIATORS!!!



Some thoughts:
1. My favorite games were The Joust, Powerball, and Assault.


2. I couldn't stand 'Nitro'.

3. 'Atlasphere' was like watching hamsters race.

4. Where are they now?

Friday Reading

Judges 1,2 and 3. Luke 17.

Thursday, March 29, 2007

Thursday Reading

Joshua 23 and 24. Luke 16.

Just Like Sgt. Pepper


Thanks to Barb and TK for participating.

I thought someone would guess the above, which launched the career of MJ. It was 25 years ago today. But that still would be wrong.

Twenty years ago today, one of the greatest moments in sports entertainment occurred.

How could you all forget?

Alright, I'll give the answer, but when you hear it you're going to slap your forehead like a V-8 disciple.

Better yet, I'll just link to it.

No, better yet, I'll put up the main event right here. Enjoy it like it was yesterday. Because it had everything:
93,173 spectators at the Silverdome. Jesse Ventura and Gorilla Monsoon (as the TV announcers), Bob Uecker (as the ring announcer), Mary Hart (as the bell ringer). Koko B. Ware. Jake the Snake with Alice Cooper. Legendary managers Bobby "The Brain" Heenan and Jimmy Hart. The Honky Tonk Man. Hacksaw Jim Duggan. Rowdy Roddy Piper. Macho Man Randy Savage with Miss Elizabeth. It reads like a Who's Who of Pro Wrestling.

And of course, there was the main event-
Andre The Giant and Hulk Hogan, both in their prime. The sizes of these two is overwhelming. Seeing Hogan pick up the 500 lb. giant and slam him still amazes me.

This was entertainment at its finest and the pinnacle of the Golden Age of the WWF.

Wednesday, March 28, 2007

Tomorrow In History

Tomorrow is a very significant day in history.

Anyone know, or care to take a guess?

Wednesday Reading

Joshua 21 and 22. Luke 15.

Tuesday, March 27, 2007

Monday, March 26, 2007

Friday, March 23, 2007

ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ

Weird day yesterday, what with DUIs and coaching resignations. I've been asleep at the wheel, too. I forgot to post Wednesday's and Thursday's readings. So I'll include that with today's.

Wednesday- Joshua 4, 5 and 6. Luke 10:1-24.

Thursday-
Joshua 7 and 8. Luke 10:25-42.

Friday-
Joshua 9 and 10. Luke 11:1-28.

Weekend-
Joshua 11, 12, 13, 14 and 15. Luke 11:29-54 and Luke 12.

Tuesday, March 20, 2007

Going Smokeless



Walt Garrison would be proud.

The former Cowboys running back used to hawk chew back when I was a kid. I loved how he pronounced Skoal, Copenhagen, and Happy Days Mint.

I'd swear he was saying, "Sko', Copenhygen, and Happa Dyes Mee-yant." Just a "peench" between your cheek and gum.

Anyway, Busch Stadium is now a smokeless facility.



I'm not a smoker, so it won't affect me, but I like the fact that Busch Stadium is now smoke-free.

But I do have two questions-
1) Is it possible to make hot dogs without producing smoke?
2) Will spittoons be installed on the backs of stadium seats in order to eject tobacco juices?

Tuesday Reading

Joshua 1, 2 and 3. Luke 9:37-62.

Monday, March 19, 2007

Sweet 16


Everyone from now on and forevermore must root for SIU in the NCAA!

Bring us some of that good luck Cardinals' mojo from last fall. Kansas is up next on Thursday night.

Everybody in for the Dawgs?

Monday Reading Assignment

Deuteronomy 33 and 34. Luke 9:1-36.

Friday, March 16, 2007

Weekend Assignment

Today-
Deuteronomy 28. Luke 7:1-17.

Weekend-
Deuteronomy 29, 30, 31 and 32. Luke 7:18-50 and Luke 8.

Thursday, March 15, 2007

Wednesday, March 14, 2007

Roll Call

Today I thought we'd go out to the garden, where we are going through my little 'roll call' to see what's showing its face so far in 2007.

But it's 80 degrees here. So I've gone on vacation.

And since I'm on vacation, I have a guest host today. And I think he's just what I need to have the best garden in the world. Ladies and gentleman...


THE GUNNY!


I am Gunnery Sgt. Ermey your senior drill instructor. From now on you will speak only when spoken to, and the first and last words out of your filthy sewers will be sir. Do you maggots understand that?

"Sir, yes, sir."
[Bleep] I can't hear you. From now on sound off like you've got a pair.
"SIR, YES, SIR."

Well now, what do we have here poking their greasy little heads through the soil?

Tulips?
"Sir, here, sir."
Did your parents have any children that lived?! If they did I'm sure they're sorry.

Lillies?
"Sir, here, sir."
You're so ugly you could be a modern art masterpiece.

Sedums?
"Sir, here, sir."
Were you born worthless, or did you have to work at it?

Hyacinths?
"Sir, here, sir."
You are pukes. You are the lowest form of life on Earth.

Daffodils?
"Sir, here, sir."
You are nothing more than unorganized grabastic pieces of amphibian [bleep].

Chrysanthemums? Chrysanthemums? Where are you [bleep]ing sorry pieces of rat turd? What exactly is your major malfunction, numbnuts?

Herman's Archangel? Herman's Archangel? I'm going to give you 3 seconds...exactly 3 [bleep]ing seconds...to get your useless slimey twinkle-toed blood-sucking carcass out of that ground.

Well, now, it looks like we've got ourselves a couple of AWOL scumbag plants in our garden here WHO HAVE JUST SIGNED THEIR OWN DEATH WARRANT!

As for the rest of you, now...I consider all of you equally worthless. You will learn that I am hard. You will not like me, but the more you hate me, the more you will grow.

If you ladies leave my island, if you survive my plant training, you will be a force, ministers of blooming praying for pollination. But until that day, you are pukes. And my orders are to weed out all slackers who are not fit to serve in my beloved Corps.

Carry on.

Wednesday Readings

Deuteronomy 23, 24 and 25. Luke 6:1-26.

Tuesday, March 13, 2007

Tuesday Readings

Deuteronomy 20, 21 and 22. Luke 5:17-39.

Monday, March 12, 2007

Monday Readings

Deuteronomy 17, 18 and 19. Luke 5:1-16.

Friday, March 09, 2007

Global Warming Dead

By the power vested in me, I now declare man-made global warming dead. It's doomed.



How do I know this?



Not the UN, that cites animals raised for food creating more greenhouse gases than cars and trucks combined.



Not the skeptical scientists who are coming out of the closet, so to speak, to condemn the idea.



Nope, I know it's over simply on the basis of this:








Yes, folks, the cover curse of Sports Illustrated.



Put something or someone on the cover of that magazine, and disaster is sure to ensue.



So don't worry. We'll all be fine.

Weekend Reading Assignment

Today- Deuteronomy 10 and 11. Luke 3:19-37.

Weekend- Deuteronomy 12, 13, 14, 15 and 16. Luke 4.

Thursday, March 08, 2007

Reading Assignments

I forgot to post yesterday's. I'm sure everyone guessed Deuteronomy 6 and 7 and Luke 2:21-52.

Today we have Deuteronomy 8 and 9 and Luke 3:1-18.

Tuesday, March 06, 2007

Monday, March 05, 2007

The Chronicles Of Jupiter: Chorus Lines, Carelessness, And UFOs

Here are some spring training photos, courtesy of the great Redbird Central.

Unfortunately, none of the photos on that website come with a story.


So, fresh off their trip to the Holy Land, I had to re-dispatch the Scottius Maximus Enterprises crack team of reporters to Jupiter, Florida, to find out the stories behind the photos. No thanks are necessary.



Our first photo involves Tony LaRussa's old friend and ex-Dallas Cowboy head coach Bill Parcells. Why is Parcells in camp? While most of you are probably thinking he is there to give a motivational speech, or to be LaRussa's "second" in a duel with Scott Rolen (although the Rolen-LaRussa feud is now reported as resolved), you'd be wrong on both accounts.

He's actually here to organize this:

That's right, The St. Louis Cardinals Chorus Line. Rumor has it that Bill is a huge Broadway show fan. And while he has a reputation as being a great NFL coach, he has an even bigger talent as a choreography coach. He's trying to get the Cardinals ready for an opening day 7th inning stretch show, a salute to the 2006 World Series Champions. Kick those legs up, boys.

Sometimes when a team wins a National League Pennant, or a World Series, they begin to think they can do more than they actually can. Witness the above. And witness this:


Yadier Molina is catching this year without a glove. When asked why, he was quite convinced it would make him a better catcher. "I'd be the only one in the majors doing it," he said confidently. "I'm already the best defensive catcher in the National League. This way, I'll be able to catch and throw in one motion. Just see how many runners I pick off or catch stealing this year."

When reminded of Scott Rolen's near disastrous efforts to play third base with his teeth when he forgot his glove during Spring Training two years ago, Yadi was incredulous. "I'm not playing with my teeth. You think I'm stupid?"

Yadi is not the only one playing without standard equipment. Albert Pujols has caught the hubris bug also. He has been taking batting practice sans bat. He is taking his swings with his right hand.

"If I am good at this, I may eventually do away with the stick permanently," said Pujols. "I seem to pick up the ball better this way. And my swing speed is much faster without the bat."

Pujols could just pull it off, because...well, he is Pujols. Unfortunately, other less talented hitters, are trying their luck with his new technique:

Yes, that is reliever Josh McKinney, who is carrying his right arm back to the dugout after he broke off it off at the shoulder from swinging too hard. The arm went sailing off his shoulder half way to the pitchers mound. Batting practice coach Whip Willis added, "I've seen a lot in my day, had balls flying at my head, pieces of broken bats...but I ain't never seen no arm." Kinney will be flown back to St. Louis on Thursday to have it reattached.

One could call McKinney careless, but that word would be an understatement if used to describe what veteran shortstop and World Series MVP David Eckstein is doing. Eckstein, still bothered by a strained muscle on his torso dating back to last fall, has incorporated a new training technique to help him overcome the pain in his side.

Yes, it's true folks. Our hero, under the tutelage of the Cardinals new trainer Master Po, is overcoming the pain in his side...by bashing himself in the back of the head with a bat. Or two.

Eckstein says, "I really don't feel the pain anymore, as long as I crack myself a couple of good ones to start the day. Master Po thinks I'll be ready for opening day."

Here's Eckstein after starting the day with a particularly vigorous workout with the bat:


"Those aren't tears," insists Eckstein. "They're what Master Po calls 'cosmic toxicity' which has built up in my side muscles. It must be beaten out through the eyes."

Inspired by Master Po's training methods, Albert Pujols even went and shaved his head.


Other Cardinals, including manager Tony LaRussa, are considering what is now called "The Po" as a new look for a new season.

The oddest thing of all, however, has to be what the following photos reveal. First visible in an afternoon photo of Eckstein's exercises. To the untrained eye it just looks like Eckstein taking a couple whacks at the top of his head. But if you look closely, you can see, in the top left hand corner of the picture, a floating spherical object in the sky.



Early the next day, a similar, possibly the same, object was seen in the sky during So Taguchi's warm up exercises.


Folks, there is no other explanation but a UFO. The Cardinals camp is being visited by extra-terrestrials. Probably by virtue of being World Champions.

The UFO didn't go unnoticed.


Outfielder Preston Wilson was the first to see the object hovering in the sky, and was quick to point it out to the rest of his teammates:

"Looky there, I said to Coach (Dave) McKay. What is that thing?" said Wilson.

The rest of the Cardinals also caught a glimpse of it and were quick to join Wilson in admiring its awe inspiring maneuvers.


Aaron Miles also caught a glimpse.

"The weird thing is, it almost looked somewhat like a baseball. Maybe its a message of peace from elsewhere in the universe," remarked the bewildered Miles.

But Cardinals spring training instructor, 86 year old George Kissell, is not preparing for peace.

"If those varmints come anywhere near me," Kissell said, "I'll savage them. We don't take kindly to invasions where I'm from."

Once the media got word of the visit, the place was crawling with reporters. But by then the aliens had disappeared.

"I guess it just is part of being World Champions," Eckstein reassured everyone. "From across the Universe, everyone, and everything, wants to be a part of it. This same thing happened when I was with Anaheim in 2003."

That's quite reassuring.

With all the weirdness going on in Florida this spring, it should be an interesting year.

Monday Reading Assignment

Deuteronomy 1, 2 and 3. Luke 1.

Did you know there is no one in the Bible named Deuteronomy? So does anyone know what it is?

Friday, March 02, 2007

Weekend Readings

Friday- Numbers 29, 30, 31. Mark 15:25-47.

Weekend- Numbers 32, 33, 34, 35 and 36. Mark 16.

Catching The Cardinals


Okay, America. Here are the radio and TV affiliates across this great Midwest country where you can pick up the Cardinals (and, on one of the 112 radio affiliates, the Mighty Mike Shannon) this season.

Courtesy of the Cardinals official website.

ARKANSAS RADIO
Batesville KBTA 1340 AM
Benton KEWI 690 AM
Conway KASR 92.7 FM
Crossett KAGH 800 AM / 104.9 FM
Danville KYEL 105.5 FM
Fort Smith KFPW 1230 AM
Helena KFFA 103.1 FM
Hot Springs KBHS 1420 AM
Morrilton KVOM 800 AM
Mountain Home KTLO 1240 AM
Paragould KDRS 1490 AM
Pocahontas KPOC 104.1 FM
Salem KSAR 92.3 FM
Searcy KSMD 99.1 FM

ARKANSAS TV
Arkadelphia Cox Communications
Batesville Cox Communications
Bono Ritter Communications
Eldorado Cox Communications
Fort Smith KPBI/KFDF-TV
Heber Springs Cox Communications
Helena Cox Communications
Hot Springs Village Cox Communications
Jonesboro Cox Communications
Little Rock KWBF-TV
Magnolia Cox Communications
Malvern Cox Communications
Marked Tree Ritter Communications
Morrilton Cox Communications
Newport Cox Communications
Paragould City Light Water & Cable
Pocahontas Cox Communications
Russellville Cox Communications
Searcy TV-3
Springdale Cox Communications


ILLINOIS RADIO
Aledo WRMJ 102.3 FM
Bloomington WJBC 1230 AM
Canton WBYS 1560 AM
Carmi WROY 1460 AM
Champaign WDWS 1400 AM
Danville WDAN 1490 AM
Decatur WSOY 1340 AM
Dixon WSEY 95.7 FM
Effingham WHQQ 98.9 FM
Fairfield WOKZ 105.9 FM
Galesburg WGIL 1400 AM
Harrisburg WEBQ 102.3 FM
Herrin WJPF 1340 AM
Jacksonville WEAI 107.1 FM
Kewanee WKEI 1450 AM
La Salle WLPO 1220 AM
Litchfield WSMI 1540 AM
Litchfield (Flagship IL) WSMI 106.1 FM
Loves Park WLUV 1520 AM
Marion WXLT 103.5 FM
Mount Carmel WYNG 94.9 FM
Mount Vernon WMIX 94.1 FM
Murphysboro WINI 1420 AM
Olney WVLN/WSEI 740 AM / 92.9 FM
Peoria WMBD 1470 AM
Quincy WGEM 105.1 FM
Robinson WTAY 1570 AM
Sparta WHCO 1230 AM

Springfield WTAX 1240 AM
Taylorville WTIM 97.3 FM

ILLINOIS TV
Decatur WBUI-TV
Flora WNOI-TV
Peoria Insight 44
Peoria WAOE-TV
Quincy WGEM/CGEM-TV


INDIANA RADIO
Evansville WYFX 106.7 FM
Jasper WQKZ 98.5 FM
Linton WQTY 93.3 FM
Vincennes WFML 96.7 FM


INDIANA TV
Evansville WAZE-TV


IOWA RADIO
Atlantic KJAN 1220 AM
Bloomfield KDMU 106.9 FM
Cedar Rapids KMJM 1360 AM
Chariton KELR 105.3 FM
Des Moines KPSZ 940 AM
Keokuk KOKX 95.3 FM
Maquoketa KMAQ 95.1 FM
Newton KCOB 1280 AM / 95.9 FM
Shenandoah KKBZ 99.3 FM

IOWA TV
Ankeny KCWI-TV
Davenport KGWB-TV
Ottumwa KYOU-TV
West Branch KWKB-TV


KENTUCKY RADIO
Benton WCBL 99.1 FM
Henderson WSON 860 AM
Mayfield WYMC 1430 AM
Morganfield WMSK 1550 AM / 95.3 FM
Murray WNBS/WRKY 1340 AM / 1130 AM
Paducah WREZ 105.5 FM
Wickliffe WGKY 95.9 FM

KENTUCKY TV
Hopkinsville WKAG-TV


MISSISSIPPI RADIO
Tupelo WTUP 1490 AM


MISSOURI RADIO
Bethany KAAN 95.5 FM
Cape Girardeau KYRX 97.3 FM
Columbia KFRU 1400 AM
Doniphan KOEA 97.5 FM
Fulton KKCA 100.5 FM
Hannibal KHMO 1070 AM
Jefferson City KATI 94.3 FM
Joplin KZYM 1230 AM
Kennett KTMO 106.5 FM
Kirksville KIRX 1450 AM
Lebanon KJEL 103.7 FM
Louisiana KJFM 102.1 FM
Memphis KMEM 100.5 FM
Mexico KXEO 1340 AM
Moberly KRES 104.7 FM
Monett KKBL 95.9 FM
Nevada KNEM / KNMO 1240 AM / 97.5 FM
Park Hills KDBB 104.3 FM
Perryville KBDZ 93.1 FM
Poplar Bluff KPPL 92.5 FM
Rolla KTTR 99.7 FM
Salem KSMO 1340 AM
Sedalia KSIS 1050 AM
Sikeston KBXB 97.9 FM
Southwest City KURM 100.3 FM
Springfield KTXR 101.3 FM
St. Joseph KSFT 1550 AM
St. Louis (Flagship) KTRS 550 AM
Sullivan KTUI 100.9 FM
Thayer KALM 1290 AM
Warrensburg KWKJ 98.5 FM
Washington KWMO 1350 AM
Waynesville KFBD 97.9 FM
West Plains KWPM AM 1450 AM
Willow Springs KUKU 1330 AM / 100.3 FM

MISSOURI TV
Cape Girardeau WDKA-TV
Columbia KQFX-TV
Joplin KGCS
Springfield KY3-TV
St. Louis KSDK-TV


OKLAHOMA RADIO
Bartlesville KWON 1400 AM
Enid KCRC 1390 AM
Norman KREF 1400 AM
Ponca City WBBZ AM 1230 AM
Tulsa KRVT/KMUR 1270 AM / 1570 AM

OKLAHOMA TV
Cushing Cox Communications
Drumwright Cox Communications
Enid Cox Communications
Muskogee Cox Communications
Oklahoma City Cox Communications
Pauls Valley Cox Communications
Seminole Cox Communications
Stillwater Cox Communications
Tulsa KWVT-TV


TENNESSEE RADIO
Dyersburg WTRO 1450 AM
Jackson WDXI 1310 AM
Lexington WZLT 99.3 FM
Memphis WSMB 680 AM
Paris WMUF 1000 AM / 104.7 FM
Ripley WTRB 1570 AM
Union City WYVY 104.9 FM

TENNESSEE TV
Jackson TRTV
Union City WOBT-TV

Thursday, March 01, 2007

Elsewhere In The Universe

Maverick News Media's Winds of War: Where's the Muslim Outrage? ties in well with Die Schreiben von Schreiber's Christian's Just Like Muslims. Yeah, right, all religions are equal. If you're a fool.

Maverick News Media also has a link to here, where all your Muhammad questions are answered.

I liked this "newspaper" front page MNM posted:


Finally, for something less depressing, go to Barb The Evil Genius for a couple of "Canon in D" You Tube shorts that are fantastic.

New Movie

Being a big fan of Kirk and Spock, I couldn't pass this up once I saw the picture. Hat tip to the great Gizmodo.



"There's another Star Trek movie on the way, and this one's a prequel that will fill in backstory on Kirk and Spock as younger men. The latest addition to the $1 billion+ franchise will be Star Trek XI, and will be helmed by ace director J.J. Abrams of Mission Impossible III fame.
The screenplay will be written by Alex Kurtzman and Roberto Orci, neither of whom have written a Star Trek screenplay before. The burning question: Who will play Kirk and Spock? Expect to see the movie in theaters by November, 2008."

Thursday Reading.

Numbers 26, 27 and 28. Mark 15:1-24.

In my New Year's quest, I am behind on German and Spanish. I hope to get out in the landscape this month. Otherwise, so far I've been able to keep up my reading and exercising, so that I am on track to complete my goals. Through the end of February, my counts for 2007 are as follows:
52 minutes of neck bridging.

3325 Hindu squats.
3310 Hindu pushups.