Sunday, October 30, 2005

"No Words Necessary, Just Pictures"*

*Al Michaels after the US defeated the USSR in the 1980 Winter Olympics Hockey Semifinals.

Hat tip to Viva El Birdos for these photos.

NFL Week 8 Picks

Last week 9-5. I am now 63-39 on the year. Here are the ESPN "experts" and their records:

At the start of this week this puts me in third place.

This week's picks:






St. Louis


San Diego

New Orleans

Tampa Bay


New England

Pittsburgh- Monday

Friday, October 28, 2005

More Sorrow In Cardinal Nation

Bob Broeg 1919-2005
"He was fair, as in just, not as in medicore."- What Broeg always wanted to be his epitaph. From

The best baseball story teller of all time.

Scottius "Encyclopedia Brown" Maximus And The Case Of The Copa Cabana

The subject of this exposition is that this man pictured above is a trouble-maker. Not in the sense that he does so purposely. It's all unintentional. But nonetheless, he's an instigator, like Woody Woodpecker.

Sure, he looks innocent. But, oh, what havoc this singer has reaped in the world of "Man-dom" since his arrival on the music scene.

A case in point. It seems this wretched woman commandeered State of Illinois property to drive 150 miles to see a Barry Manilow concert in January 2002. And then tried to get reimbursed for it. Which led to her resignation from her position and arrest. She has now been convicted and is awaiting sentencing. Tough story, right?

Well, it's too bad I'm no journalist. Because this story, as pathetic as it is, is not the "real story". And any journalist worth his weight in ink would be able to see it.

Read the second paragraph. Her husband ACCOMPANIED HER TO A BARRY MANILOW CONCERT. That is the real story here. And yet we are not told anything else about this.

How many questions immediately pop in to your mind? One? Five? Twelve? Fifty? I could hardly get past this statement.

What does this reporter mean, "What she did was attend a Barry Manilow concert in Rosemont with her husband?" The real question is WHY? Don't give me facts about the trial. Give me facts about this man. Why would a grown man do this?

It is obvious this reporter doesn't recognize a real story when it hits them between the eyes.

Since this reporter did not go after the real story, and since I'm not a journalist, I'd like Columbo to take this case. Because it is possible that other crimes were committed here.

What did this guy do that he had to accompany his wife to a Barry Manilow concert? I'm stunned.

In the world of Man-dom, few things would be more punishment than this. Every guy in America would rather spend a night on their frozen tundra of a lawn in the backyard doghouse than accept this punishment. They'd rather do laundry for a thousand Sundays than this.

I'll bet this husband is not a longshoreman. A merchant marine. A policeman or fireman. A soldier or construction worker. Just a hunch.

Not that Barry is not a fine musician. He is. But it's just that it's rumored that Barry is...and, well, his male fans are...well, YOU KNOW. "Not that there's anything wrong with that".

No other man has ever had the thought occur, "Hey, I'd love to go to a Barry Manilow concert."

I can think of one thing worse than being forced to attend this concert, and that is being forced to attend this concert and having your local newspaper snap a picture of you there. That would be the end of life as you know it.

So what did he do? Spend too many nights with the boys playing poker? Participate in a Christmas party gone bad? Get caught in a lie? Visit a gentleman's club? Whatever it is, it has to be big. HUGE. Otherwise he would have never bought tickets to a Barry Manilow concert to make up for it.

It couldn't have been that he forgot to take the garbage out. Or he let the lawn get too long. In marriage, the punishment must fit the crime.

Boy, if I were a reporter, I wouldn't let an important story like this get sidetracked by an insignificant state employee misusing state property. But I guess this is what a blogger does best. Get at the heart of the story when the MSM won't.

Tuesday, October 25, 2005

What's That Smell?

Why, it's none other than Marilyn Manson.

It seems he has a new fragrance to peddle. And nothing says "delicious aroma" like Marilyn Manson. I mean, who hasn't smelled a freshly cut lawn, or a bed of roses, or the atmosphere after a steady rain, or a pine tree, and thought to themselves, "I bet Marilyn Manson smells this good."

Excellent choice, perfume-makers. I'm sure "L'Essence of Bat Hormone" smells wonderful for a night on the town. I'll bet "Parfum de Lavender Corpse" makes the ladies swoon.

Just look at him. Looking at his picture, one cannot help but get the thought, "I want to smell like that guy."

But, they've forgotten more deserving people. I'd much rather see the following get their own fragrance before Mr. Marilyn.

Junior Samples
"Tincture of Hee Haw"

Matt Foley
"Whiff de Government Cheese"

Lawrence Welk
"Polka Parfum Accordion"

Budweiser's "Louie"
"Bouquet de Chameleon "

Paul Harvey
"Paul Harvey's The Rest Of The Scent"

Katie Luther
"Deine Bier Riecht Ausgezeichnet"

John Madden
"Jean Mad'den De Footballer 2006"

Harriet Miers
"L'odeur de SCOTUS."

Monday, October 24, 2005

Busch Stadium Song

Put this song to video, and you'll see a grown ape cry. You might see it anyway. Forty seasons of memories. For a guy who's turning 42.

Some of the good-bye graffiti on Busch Stadium after last Wednesday's game (Charlie Riedel/AP).

John Rodriguez takes one last look at Busch Stadium after Game 6. (Charlie Neibergall/AP)- from The Cardinals Website.

Sunday, October 23, 2005

NFL Picks Week 7

Last week I was 11-3, bringing my record to 54-34. Here is how I compare to the NFL "experts" at ESPN:


This would put me tied for 3rd. Tough week this week though:

Miami- Friday
St. Louis

Green Bay











Atlanta- Monday

Saturday, October 22, 2005

I Still Got It!

You Passed 8th Grade Math

Congratulations, you got 10/10 correct!

Okay, so based just on the title of this post, you can see I was better at Math than English!

And, based on my whole darn blog, you can tell I was better at Math than English!

Friday, October 21, 2005

How About Some Good News?

Spread the word! Help us sponsor confessional Lutheran Churches!

A few months back, I posted about the ULMA, a new association of independent confessional Lutheran churches. There are two churches in the association right now, both of whom left the Missouri Synod after the disastrous convention in 2004.

One of them is my church, Pilgrim Lutheran. There are several other congregations wanting to join the association, in this country as well as in Germany and Australia. There are also some wanting to be mission congregations because they would need support if they left their current affiliation.

A new independent Lutheran congregation in Milwaukee is now being started, I believe in response to the family who has come to worship with us in Decatur, IL on more than one Sunday, all the way from Milwaukee. Because they cannot find a confessional Lutheran Church in the area. That is a 5 hour drive. And that is a fact.

These people had no ties to our congregation, but when they found out we left the Missouri Synod, and why we left, they decided to visit one Sunday last spring. And they have come back one or two other times to worship in addition to meeting with our pastors. An amazing story, I think.

The following is from Reclaim News, edited by the Rev. Jack Cascione. He is the pastor of the other church presently in the association, Redeemer Lutheran in Michigan, and a very strong Waltherian Lutheran. One of our pastors will be guest preacher on the advertised date in November and teach the Bible Class. Which will be a definite treat for Milwaukee. But I'm biased.

"ULMA to Open New Independent Lutheran Congregation In Milwaukee

The United Lutheran Mission Association is opening a traditional independent Lutheran church in the Milwaukee area. Advertisements about the first worship service will appear in Milwaukee area papers.

Volunteers who would like to participate in passing our flyers on October 28-29 in northwestern Milwaukee suburbs, including Brookfield and Wauwatosa, should call 217-877-2444.


Holiday Inn Express
Conference Room
11111 West North Ave.
Wauwatosa, Wisconsin 53226
Phone 414-778-0333

Worship Service, Sunday, November 20 at 9:00 a.m.
Bible Study/ Informational meeting at 10:15 a.m.

Guest Preacher
Rev. William Abbott
Pastor of Pilgrim Lutheran Church in Decatur IL

Abbott's Bible class will focus on "The Sheep Judge Their Shepherd" by C.F.W. Walther, and related Bible texts.

For more information you may also call one of our sponsoring congregations:
Pilgrim Lutheran Church of Decatur, Illinois at 217-875-1115
Redeemer Lutheran Church of St. Clair Shores, Michigan at 586-294-0640

Information online is available at or by emailing

To receive ReclaimNews type "subscribe" in subject line.

To cancel ReclaimNews type "unsubscribe" in subject line

List owner and Reclaim News editor, Rev. Jack Cascione can be reached at

Also participate in for discussion.

Also view for papers, articles, & previous releases."

Final Thoughts For MLB 2005

Well, the Cardinals are done. So I've come out of my room. I'm actually a little relieved I only had to spend a week there. My eyes are having difficulty adjusting to all the light now. And it was getting kinda messy. Better clean up the floor:

Just kidding.

Final thoughts:

- Thank you Larry Walker for an exciting 14 months. I wish his body would heal like a 20 year old's would. But being 42, I know what that's like. And he hung in there this year despite his pain, and he ended my last visit to Busch Stadium with a happy memory. Enjoy your retirement, Larry.

- Happy Trails to Reggie Sanders. And thanks for a magical two seasons. My biggest fear is that Walt Jocketty will not re-sign him, and his vagabond reputation will continue. Which is a shame, because the city of St. Louis is willing to be his home.

- Good bye Matt Morris. I'm sure that with starting pitching in short supply this free-agent season, someone will throw outrageous money at his beard and take a chance on him. The Cardinals know better. He's good, but not great. But thanks for a lot of exciting times.

- Welcome back, Scott Rolen, in 2006. We sure missed you the past 5 months. Actually, the past year.

- Albert Pujols is the best player in baseball. There is no longer an argument to be made.

- Taking a chance on Mark Mulder with last December's trade was a good gamble, but he is not a big game pitcher. He proved that again last night. And listening to Tony LaRussa speak after last night's game makes me think he is definitely in the doghouse. Our manager was not happy with his execution or his mental lapses. However, his status with the club is secure, I think, so that they should pick up his option for next year.

- Success sometimes breeds contentment. This club, after being SWEPT out of the 2004 World Series, did not play like it had something to prove. It played like it had nothing to prove. I know, injuries, injuries, injuries. But there was just a seeming lack of the enthusiasm and joy for baseball that I definitely saw on the 2004 team. Next year will hopefully end differently.

- Jason Marquis, by his performance on the field, proved Tony LaRussa correct in not putting him in the post-season starting rotation. Which makes Marquis' complaining about it seem ridiculous now. I think he's gone in a trade this winter.

- I think the starting pitching will be okay, but Jocketty's number one priority has got to be a more reliable bullpen. The lineup will be fine with Rolen, Eckstein, Edmonds, Molina, and that one guy...Poojoles I think is his name. Just plug in either Sanders or another free agent to play right, sign Grudzielanek, and let J. Rod or So, or another prospect duke it out for left. It worked in 2004 before Walker arrived. And then we can see what we have come July or August, with enough financial room to make a move if needed.

- Good-bye Julian Tavarez, another free agent. He'll be plucked by someone wanting to pay too much money for a steady but not spectacular set-up man. I just wish he could have worn the Zorro mask at least once.

- Good-bye Abraham Nunez, super-sub. He'll also be picked up by someone throwing money around this winter, based strictly on this year's performance. Big mistake.

- I think Grudzielanek, another free agent, will be back. Okay, let me rephrase, this. I hope he'll be back. Why? Too good of a player, and a LaRussa type player.

- The wrecking ball countdown begins. For some final, tear-inducing photos of Busch Stadium's final moments, check out the gallery at the Cardinals official website.

Thursday, October 20, 2005

I'm Feeling A Little Empty Right Now

As I always do this time of year. For the first time in 6 1/2 months, there are no ballgames. But only 4 months 'til spring training. Hope springs eternal.

Wednesday, October 19, 2005

Sorry, But I Got Bored Here In My Room

I wasn't going to do this but I HAVE to. Check this out:

Sure, It's Quiet In My Room Right Now...

...Because I'm just shell shocked and exhausted. Haven't slept much since King Albert's home run. Pure joy has that effect on me.

...And because I've been around long enough to know not to celebrate before the deed is done. There's way too much work for the Cardinals to do. Let's hope they can do it again. So, you'll see no gloating here. But I have been grinning from ear to ear the past two days.

Mike Shannon pronounced in the 5th, or maybe 6th, inning of Monday night's game that the Cardinals will be heading back to play game six at Busch on Wednesday. He even announced the pregame show will begin at 6:51 p.m. Hence, during his call of Albert's home run, he can be heard yelling "What did I tell you folks!".

This moment in time has all the makings of the single greatest moment in Cardinals history. Albert at the plate, Albert winning the game almost single handedly in the ninth inning (both at the plate and in the field), and Mike Shannon at the mike. More was at stake than with Jack Clark's, Ozzie Smith's, or Mark McGwire's homers.

But only if it is validated with the pennant.

And Busch lives for at least one more game. Now, no matter what happens, we can say good-bye to the stadium properly, because we will know when we have seen that last inning played.

Please pardon me for my silence. I'll just smile for now.

Sunday, October 16, 2005

NFL Picks Week 6

Last week I was an ugly 7-7. Leaving me at 43-31 for the year. Here's how I am faring against the NFL "Experts" at ESPN:

I'd be tied for 4th. Not bad. Unfortunately they won't hire me (imagine that).

Week 6:

Tampa Bay










San Diego


Indianapolis- Monday

Saturday, October 15, 2005

A Message To Kiihnworld

...we're all counting on you."- Leslie Nielsen (and Scottius Maximus)

Go get 'em!

And for the rest of you...even if you're visiting this blog by accident, please go here to vote the great Kiihnworld blog of the week. It is very deserving.

(Paid for by the Committee to Elect Kiihnworld Crosley Solo Blog Of The Week- In Other Words, Me)

Friday, October 14, 2005

Did You Ever...

Have a great idea for a post at night and then forget it by the next morning?

I need to get a pen and paper and put it on my nightstand.

Since I can't remember it, you're free to make up whatever you want here:

I found this subject hilarious last night. Seems kind of lame now, now that I've forgotten what it was.

Defense Anbody?

Last night's game can be summed up in two words:

D. Fence.

The Astros had it and the Cardinals didn't.

The Astros made several big plays and hustled their tails off. And the Cardinals botched a few big plays and a lack of hustle cost a run. Which is very unusual for Tony LaRussa's team.

Call it hunger or a sense of urgency, but the Astros had it last night. Diving plays. Sliding through the outfield. Taking the extra-base. Give them credit. They let it all hang out and it paid off.

The Cardinals' Jim Edmonds, a defensive wizard, seemed to trot to a ball in the 2nd inning, allowing Burke to get to a triple instead of a double. He wouldn't have scored if not for a passed ball allowed by the young Molina.

The Cardinals were totally outplayed. And Reggie Sanders softball league-ish attempt at a catch in the eighth inning of a 2-1 game seemed to signal to me the Cardinals weren't going to pull this one out.

And they didn't. Let's hope that pathetic effort was not the last game played at Busch Stadium.

The Cardinals now must win one in Houston. They won't get that one tomorrow. Morris and his beard are matched up against Roger Clemens. Let's face it. That's a loss.

I'm hoping the Cardinals pull out the game Sunday. The whole series is going to turn on that game. Go Soup Can.

Thursday, October 13, 2005

And One Last Thing...

What, is she an Astros fan?

What the heck did this woman do?

A lot of scorn and ridicule out there. Piling on. The President asked her to do something. She said "Okay, I'm game."

Let's string her up.

The world is coming to an end. Many souls to be saved. Lots of work to do. And that inbred Bush had to go and nominate this low-life.

Doesn't he understand what is at stake? The world's a mess! And this Supreme Court nomination is THE MOST important thing on God's earth right now.

Doesn't he realize that judges and politicans are our saviors in America. Sure, the Lord is in control. But if we humans don't get this right, America, and therefore, the whole world, will come crashing down.

I am rooting for her just because everyone else isn't. She doesn't have credentials.

In the world I live in, I know lots of people with credentials. And no common sense.

No way she gets confirmed. I know that. But it is my instinct to root for the underdog. So, until she actually says or does something that I am opposed to, I say, "Go Harriet!"

Unless she's an Astros fan. Then throw her to the lions!

"I Can't Take It, Captain"

There was absolutely no excuse for my ST segments and T waves to be doing this last night:

I blame Larussa for my acute myocardial infarction. There was no reason I know of to bring in Isringhausen in the ninth inning with a 3 run lead. Except to unhinge any plaques in my coronary arteries. Anyone who thinks a 3 run lead is safe in this guy's hands has not watched Cardinals baseball this year.

Carpenter had sailed through the eighth, so why risk bringing in the Cardinals' human blowtorch?

Note to Cardinals medical staff:
Whatever you are feeding Reggie Sanders, how about giving Isringhausen a taste?

I guess I should just be happy the Cardinals "escaped" with a 5-2 win. Let's hope tonight is a blow out victory for us. Otherwise I'll be forced to leave my room to get to the nearest intensive care unit.

Wednesday, October 12, 2005

Oh, And One More Thing...

Before I go.

Thanks to this guy, I am now obsolete. This little robot can carry my wife's bags. I'll never have to go shopping again. Life is good.

Read all about it here.

I'll Be In Self-imposed Exile For Awhile

Due to the NLCS, Scottius Maximus sightings in public will cease. I'll be in my room if you need me, watching this series unfold. Fortunately I'll have my computer close by to blog my exhilaration or frustration.

For me, the world is about to stop.

The ALCS started yesterday. The NLCS starts tonight. I can't believe it is here. The season sure went fast. And believe it or not I'm calm about it.

If there are any teams more deserving to win a title than the Cardinals, it would have to be the Astros and White Sox. That other Chicago team is not more deserving before anyone jumps in (and if you need an explanation, I don't have the time to explain in less than 11 posts). I'm NOT saying they ARE more deserving, because the team that earns it on the field is the one who is deserving in any given year. But I'm speaking historically.

Which is why I am surprisingly calm about the NLCS this year. Don't get me wrong. I want the Cardinals to win. Strongly. But if they don't, I can live with the Astros winning. Historically I have always liked them. They have always conducted themselves with class in victory or defeat, unlike that NL Chicago team. Their rivalry with the Cardinals is very professional. Each team respects the other.

And I also like the White Sox. Always have. They are the blue collar, less popular offering (i.e., red-headed step-child) of Chicago baseball. Easy to root for their success.

The Angels are easy to like also. A lot of good, hard-working players.

For the first time in years, I can honestly say I can live with whoever wins it all.

Which is another reason to like the Angels and White Sox. They tag-teamed the evil Black Jacks, errr...Yankees and Red Sox, into oblivion.

"Red Sox" Black Jack Lanza and "Yankee" Black Jack Mulligan

That being said...the world is about to stop for me. For the next week at least. Hopefully longer.

If anything big happens, like the earth is about to blow up and we're all escaping to another planet or something, please send me a line at

New Game For All You Beer Drinkers

Guaranteed fun. Preferably at home, or out if you have a designated driver.

It's the perfect combo for a game: beer and baseball.

How to play:
It's easy.

This game is premised on the FACT that during the ACLS and NLCS the Yankees and Red Sox will be mentioned. Probably a lot.

Even though neither are participating in this year's festivities (thank the Lord for that). But watch the announcers (yes, Joe Buck included) try to get in as many Yankees and Red Sox references as possible. Call it the great East-coast media bias or whatever you want.

And this is where it will get interesting. For every story about the Yankees or Red Sox, every reference to a Yankees or Red Sox player, manager, coach, and fan, polish off the beer in your hand and grab another.

Warnings: The surgeon general has determined that playing this game is extremely hazardous to your health. In fact, if you choose to participate, medical personnel should be close by to catch you when you fall over and safely transport you to the nearest ER. Driving is absolutely prohibited. Do not participate on consecutive nights. It would be advisable to call in sick to work the next morning. Must be 21 or older.

Tuesday, October 11, 2005

An Essay On Sin And Baseball: Another "Curse" Point Of View From The Great Viva El Birdos

Interesting "sermon" from lboros at Viva El Birdos regarding the White Sox and their curse:

"did y'ever consider this: if the chixos reach the world series, it'll be the 2d straight year in which the al representative is trying to erase an 86-yr-old curse? in boxos' case last year, it was the curse of the babe; here it'd be the curse of the black sox, whose infamous series-fixing caper went down 86 years ago this autumn. talk about a curse: the xos finished 2d in 1920, after which season commish kenesaw mtn landis banned 1/3 of the team from the game. they would finish no higher than 5th until 1936 . . . . they stayed in the 1st division (mostly) until 1944, spent another 7 seasons in the bottom half of the al, and finally returned to 3d place in 1952 under paul richards. they finished 3d six consecutive years (did you know marty marion managed them from 1954-56? i didn't) before finally inching up to 2d place in 1957 -- their first return to that perch since before the black sox were thrown out of the game. they repeated as runners-up in 1958 and then finally returned to 1st place in 1959, having wandered 40 years in the desert.

they lost to the dodgers in six games. they have never returned to the world series.

i mean, where are the networks on this one? this thing has taken on biblical proportions -- a curse rooted not in the whimsy of some imaginary capricious god but rather in the commonplace sins of earthly humans: the wrongdoings of 1919. they have gone unredeemed all these years, a stain on the soul of the franchise. we heard so much last fall about the beantown geezers who could finally die happy, it took 85 years but they finally saw the sox win one. consider then the suffering of south-side grandfathers, who've have spent their lives rooting under a cloud much darker and more disturbing than the ridiculous "curse of the babe." from webster's 10th:

curse n [ME curs, fr OE] (bef. 12c) . . . . 3 evil or misfortune that comes as if in response to imprecation or as retribution
retribution. that's what these last 86 years have been on the south side; punishment of sin -- the greed of charley comiskey, the cynicism of eddie cicotte, the ignorance of shoeless joe jackson.

which may help explain why this plotline doesn't captivate us: it's too scary, not enough like a fairy tale. and so it gets swept under the rug, out of sight, where we like to hide all true sin . . . . . or maybe it's just that these sox have never had a ted williams, a jim rice, a wade boggs to put an epic face on their tale, nor a roger angell or peter gammons to elevate it from folklore to literature. but it's a pretty goddamn good story. under other circumstances, i would probably be rooting for these accursed to earn their redemption at long last, to remove the guilty stain and make those sox white again.

but if they play the cardinals? suffer on, ye wretched sinners. hellfire's too goodfer ye. . . . ."

Monday, October 10, 2005

Boy, Did I Goof Up One Of Saturday's Posts

(Photo courtesy of

Well, I've goofed again.

Just call me the Gilligan of the blogosphere. I don't know how I missed this, but there were other photos on the New Launches website that I missed on this post.

Fortunately, the great Kiihnworld has discovered them and posted them, as I have reproduced below (without permission I must admit):

No words necessary...


Sunday, October 09, 2005

NFL Picks Week 5

I was 10-4 last week, leaving me 36-24 for the season.

Tampa Bay

St. Louis
Green Bay
San Diego- Monday

Saturday, October 08, 2005

I Prefer Bite Size, Myself

Here's me:

Nutty and gooey - you always satisfy.

Anyone Else Getting The Strange Feeling...

...That another "curse" is about to be broken at the Cardinals expense? The White Sox curse is older than the Red Sox. And they're looking pretty good as a possible Series opponent for the Cardinals.

If the Cardinals get to the World Series and lose to the White Sox, it is officially time to start campaigning for the Cardinals to get a curse of their own.

We could call it the curse of Lonnie Smith. Or of Keith Hernandez. Both went on to win World Series titles with other teams, after the Cardinals won a title with them both in 1982 and subsequently traded them in 1983 because they were "doped up" out of their minds on cocaine.

How's "The Curse of the Cardinals' Cocaine" sound? Nah, that sounds too Encyclopedia Brown-like.

But consider the following, fellow curse conspirators:

1985- The Cardinals play the World Series without regular left fielder Vince Coleman because a tarp "eats his leg." The Cardinals lose to the Royals in seven games.

1987- The Cardinals play the World Series without two injured regulars, Jack Clark (1B) and Terry Pendleton (3B). Despite a valiant effort, the Cardinals lose to the Twins in seven games.

2001- The Cardinals Mark McGwire is so beat up he has to be PINCH HIT FOR for cryin' out loud, in a tie-ball game. A series deciding ballgame. And the Cardinals end up losing because of little Tony Womack in the bottom of the 9th of that game. And the Diamondbacks go on to win the World Series.

2002- The Cardinals lose their number 2 starter, Darryl Kile. No, not to an injury, but to a
FREAKING untimely death. And the Cardinals lose to the Giants in the NLCS. Top that one, Red or White Sox.

2004- The Cardinals lose their number 1 starter, Chris Carpenter, just before the playoffs start. The Cardinals lose to the Red Sox in the World Series.

2005- The Cardinals lose their starting 3rd baseman for the year. Outcome to be determined.

Think we're not "cursed" ourselves. Think again.

1982 was a long time ago, folks.

Let's do it this year. Reverse the curse. Please?

Lesson Learned

Note to self:

Don't go to the bathroom after munching on one of these with my fingers:

The Koreans Continue To Be My Favorites

Remember this from the summer? The Korean cartoonist's rendition of the National League Central? Choi Hoon was his name.

Well, he's at it again. Anyone out there who can read Korean? The gist of it is apparent- the Padres have no chance. Let's hope he's right.

Thank you, again, to the best Cardinals blog out there, Viva El Birdos!

Update: lboros has published the translations. They're below. Hilarious.

"The padre in the cartoon with Walker is telling himself to play possom so he doesn't get eaten.

The second one is of the fans cheering Peavy on. They're literally saying "Peavy, Fighting!" It is an actual phrase in Korean, it means do your best. Other fans are telling him to suck it up and do well. Peavy is saying "you... you." He's basically shaking his head at the fans. The Cards are just amused."

Don't Even Get Me Started

The dreaded Japanese scientists have struck again. Got this from the great Gizmodo.

Real photo. Real dog. Real car (Honda, I think). 'Nuff said.

Listen Up, All Bloggers- I Just Had A Revelation!

Oops. Sorry, I didn't. I just used that to get your attention. What do you think I am, a charismatic evangelical president?

But I do have an idea.

Hopefully, all of us like blogging, right? And a lot of us like talk radio in its various forms, right?

Well why not combine the two?

That's right. I believe the time has come for "Talk Blogging."

We'll post our thoughts verbally and broadcast them for the whole world to hear on their computers, a la radio.

Each of us would have their own "show".

Who's with me?

Hey, Blogger, how about it?

Friday, October 07, 2005

Maybe It's 'Cause It Rhymes With Mets And Nets

New York Jets.

The Jets nickname is cool. I've always liked the name "Jets". But why nickname your team "Jets" when nothing about this uniform has anything to do with jets?

Helmet design:
I love the basic white on the helmet. I just realized something. At one time, in the early 1970s, this entire division (AFC East) wore white helmets. Then the Jets were the first in the division to go away from it. And I'm glad they changed back to this traditional helmet a few years ago. Because I like it better than the solid green metallic helmet they used to have.
I like the black cage. The stripes have been kept minimal. And I think I've reached the conclusion that on a white helmet, stripes are okay. They make the helmet less bland. The decal is a little boring, but it is the traditional look, so I cannot find fault with them sticking with it.

Score: +1

Color scheme:
This is really simple. White, green, and black. Not pretty, not spectacular, but an attractive color of green was picked. Not that neon semi-metallic Eagles color of green, which stops just short of being teal. No, this is a man's green. But it is at this point where I have to ask the question again, what do these colors have to do with jets? Maybe they should rename them the New Jersey ('cause they play in NJ) Plants.


Score: +1

The basic home choice has all the elements I like: solid green color, simple white numbers, a stripe on the shoulder, and no shoulder pad number placements.

The basic away version is just the reverse of the home version. I love it. Looks like it's fit for playing football at the North Pole. It's so white, there's something polar about it.

Score: +1

Leg wear:
I like the white with either one stripe or two. And I love the black shoes on all versions. There is some directional clashivity on the away uniforms white socks with horizontal stripe vs. the pants vertical stripe.

But those green things of the alternative uniform are gross. They remind me of a pair of green jeans I had when I was an pre-teen. Just weird looking.

Home +1
Away 0
Alternate -1
Average of 0.

Overall effect:
The classic home uniform matches in perfect simplicity from helmet to the black shoes. The classic away uniform fulfills in the same way. And that green thing is fit for a monster. But no +2s will be given, because, after all, shouldn't they have to put a jet or something on this baby? That being said, nice job, Plants, errrrrrr...Jets.

Home +1
Away +1
Alternate -1
Average of +0.3.

Historic factor:
For having the sense to ditch the more modern look and go retro, complete with black shoes and all, I give them a bonus + 1 point.

HD: +1
CS: +1
J: +1
LW: 0
OE: +0.3
HF: +1


That's a wrap for the AFC East.

The NFC South is up next.

So until then, as The Hulkster might say, "Remember kids, take your vitamins, say your prayers, and stay in school. And don't do drugs, or you'll end up wearing the modern day Bills uniform."