Thursday, November 25, 2004

Do Not Adjust Your Set

We got through the whole Janet Jackson controversy and the recent Monday Night Football intro fiasco. However, after what I witnessed today, I can't take it any more. So I'm going to get busy. It is time for all of America to take a stand.

Open Letter to the FCC:

I am writing to express my concern over the content of the NFL game broadcast this evening on Fox. Not only were we subjected to a rotten football game, but I feel my health and the health of my family was put in jeopardy by perhaps the ugliest uniform scheme I have ever seen. According to local reports, there has been a large increase in the number of incidents of nausea, headaches, dizziness, syncope, and even seizures since approximately 3 p.m. CST. The long term effects on our children are unknown at this time.

This is not the first time we have been subjected to this particular brand of unfashionable color scheme negligence. We have been forced to view the Syracuse Orange, the Illinois Fighting Illini, and the Oregon Ducks previously in college sports, and I feel compelled to express my concern before someone gets hurt.

I hope you have the stomach to investigate my complaint.

Sincerely,

A Frightened Fan

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