Saturday, September 22, 2012

Random Thoughts After A Long Summer Hiatus

No, I didn't retire.  It was just a little summer hiatus, not unlike how TV shows used to disappear during the summer.  Let's face it, during the summer, just like in television, no one "watches" this blog anyway.

Okay.  To be perfectly honest, no one watches this blog in fall, winter or spring, either.  But I've had a few things on my mind.

- How do male Olympic divers keep their little bikini shorts on? Every time I dive in a pool off the side, it seems I've got to pull my "trunks" up to some degree, and if I've hit the water at high speed, I've had to literally reach down and pull them up.  And yet, so far in Olympic TV history, there hasn't been one wardrobe malfunction?  I can't wrap my mind around it.  Perhaps I'm doing something wrong.

- Who, or what, was Canada named after? Did Amerigo Vespuci have a brother named Canada? Or is it more subtle than that?  Like, nada, meaning "no", and can, meaning "a container of some kind". Making Canada the "land of no cans".  That's it, isn't it?

-Is the little Geico lizard Australian or a lower class Britishter?

-At what age do women start having a "hair day"? It seems none do in their 20s and 30s, yet 60 and ups seem to have one. For some seasoned citizens, it's Monday, for others Tuesday, or Wednesday...or...whatever.  Which leads me to believe it happens somewhere in the 40s or 50s.

-I am absolutely loving the Redskins uniforms.  Their burgundy over gold  And the white over gold is almost as great.

-Joe Buck. Okay, so not a random thought per se, but his name just popped in my head. Make up your own thought. I can't be relied upon for everything.

-Since we've had a hurricane Gustav in the past, don't you think we've reached the bottom of the hurricane naming barrel? Gustav? I have never known anyone by that name.  We should just start using Roman numerals- "LOOK OUT- HERE COMES HURRICANE CXIV!".  Like with Super Bowls.  By the way, CXIV- that sounds like a particularly brutal hurricane.

-Or better yet, let's use Roman numerals for hurricanes and start using those worn out names for Super Bowls.  This year, it's Super Bowl Gustav.  That sounds much better.

-Has anyone ever mistaken a tube of Desitin for tooth paste?  Yeah, me neither.

- Football Night In America's opening song, while having its own merits, will never be as great as Hank Williams' Monday Night Football theme song.

-It took me years to realize that the Financial Times was not the same thing as High Times.

-There was once a Buffalo Synod of the Lutheran Church in the US. For my scholarly activity this summer, I discovered there was also a Chicken Synod and a Tuna Synod.  But never a Hot Wings Synod.  I think.

- Here we are, on the verge of another post-season, and I realize I never got caught up on my sleep from last October.  It's still up in the air whether the Cardinals will make it back, but I may end up with early onset dementia if they do.  My brain has already had too many nights that lacked adequate sleep in my life.

- Still wondering exactly how the Cardinals won the World Series last year?  Would you believe Olivia Newton John has answered that question?

- I recently heard the song "Get Off" by Foxy on Sirius 70s on 7.  Hadn't heard it in probably 34 years.  I never knew this was a white group, till I saw the video.

- I also came to the realization, through 70s on 7, there is one song that absolutely must be played at my funeral.  What do you think?  Catchy, ain't it?