I've been glad to show you this stadium's development from an embryo, and now that it's reaching full term, and it's ready to be born (EDC 4/10/06)...(sniff, sniff) I'm feeling rather sad!
This baby is already beautiful, isn't she, even before birth?! Okay, I'm prejudiced. I'll probably really break up when it's time for her to go to kindergarten.
Say, speaking of babies, that reminds me of the funniest joke I ever heard. I first saw it told by Flip Wilson on the Tonight Show with Johnny Carson. Seeing it in print is funny, but to see it performed by Flip Wilson is THE BEST.
"What I had in mind mentioning was an incident that took place recently when I was returning from Chicago by train. And I got on the train and I just fell out in the seat there. And I noticed that the woman across from me in the aisle had her baby with her. Ugly baby. Ugly baby.
From the other end of the coach comes this guy and he was very drunk and he was staring at the baby. And the woman heard him when he said to her under his breath, "Damn." And she turned to him, she said, 'what the hell are you looking at?" And the guy said, "I'm looking at that ugly baby. That's a horrible looking baby lady. Where'd you get that baby from?" And the woman said, "I don't have to take that!"
And she snatched the emergency cord and the train came to a screeching halt, and the conductor came running in, now this was his moment, at this moment he represented the Pennsylvania Railroad. And he said, "what's going on here?" And the woman said, "this man just insulted me. I don't have to spend my money and ride this railroad and be insulted. I'd rather walk."
And the conductor said, "Calm down! Calm down! Madame there's nothing, nothing, that the Pennsylvania Railroad will not do to avoid having situations such as this. Perhaps it would be more to your convience if we were to rearrange your seating, let you sit somewhere else in the coach. And as a small compensation from the railroad, if you will accompany me to the dining car, we are going to give you a free meal. And maybe we'll find a banana for your monkey."