This Offends Me

No, not the trash littering the surface of the Moon.



It's the lack of color on the Moon.



Go here to view some really awesome panoramic pictures of the Moon from the Apollo missions (hat tip to Cyberbrethren).




According to Popular Mechanics March 2007, we will be going back there some day and staying.

Maybe so.


But if we do, I have a few requests:
1) Bring a dumpster for the trash.

2) Take one of those guys in the orange jumpsuits and the long handled grabbers along to pick it up.

3) Make the other astronauts wear another color, just not white. How about red? Or better yet, design the outfits to look like the Cardinals' uniform. Instead of birds on the bat, however, put the birds on the tether, or some other spaceman equipment piece.

4) Xeriscaping is becoming very popular. So why not take a few desert plants and put 'em in the moon's ground? How about stonecrop? There are certainly plenty of rocks up there for a nice landscaping project. Of course you'd probably need to build a shed for your gardening equipment. And there may be a little problem with rain. I'm not sure how much one can expect there. The Weather Channel has been rather negligent updating us on Moon weather.

5) I'm also not sure what gardening "zone" the Moon is in. I've looked at all my books. There's plenty of North American zone data, but no "Moon zone" data.

6) Every landscape needs a pond, so we could bring that hardscape stuff along too. Go here and pick me out a winner that would look good on the Moon.

7) Ditto a fountain and a waterfall. Perhaps building the pond next to the side of one of those sandy looking slopes would help tremendously. A natural place for a waterfall. Just some PVC pipe and a solar powered pump would be all the extras necessary.

8) Instead of American Flags, plant Cardinals flags. Since they are World Series Champions and all.

9) You have all the dirt you need for a ballpark. Busch Stadium IV could be grated out of the dust. Sod would probably bake, but perhaps Astro-Turf could make its comeback here.



Get it? "Astro"-Turf?



10) Of course, with less gravity, you'd have to move the fences back, probably to around 800 feet.





Okay, NASA...give me a call. I got your next Moon mission right here. We can definitely pretty up that joint.