How'd I do, you ask?
On Thursday September 4, 2008, the NFL season started. And I put myself out on a ledge with trying to predict the order of finish of the 8 divisions.
Well, here are my predictions, with the predicted order on the left, and the actual final standing on the right.
NFC East
1. Cowboys. 3
2. Eagles. 2
3. Giants. 1
4. Redskins. 4
NFC North
1. Vikings. 1
2. Packers. 3
3. Bears. 2
4. Lions. 4
NFC South
1. Saints. 4
2. Panthers. 1
3. Buccaneers. 3
4. Falcons. 2
NFC West
1. Seahawks. 3
2. Cardinals. 1
3. Forty-niners. 2
4. Rams. 4
AFC East
1. Patriots. 2
2. Jets. 3
3. Bills. 4
4. Dolphins. 1
AFC North
1. Browns. 4
2. Steelers. 1
3. Bengals. 3
4. Ravens. 2
AFC South
1. Colts. 2
2. Jaguars. 4
3. Titans. 1
4. Texans. 3
AFC West
1. Chargers. 1
2. Raiders. 3
3. Broncos. 2
4. Chiefs. 4
So, I got 9 right out of 32. And I completely misfired on Cleveland, Miami and New Orleans. I did get at least one team right in every division in the NFC.
Okay, you can let me have it now, but not too harshly, in the comments.
Monday, December 29, 2008
Sunday, December 28, 2008
NFL Week 17
Last week finished at 7-7, but the Bears are still alive, so it wasn't too bad of a week. My overall record is 151-85-1. I would have been 2-1 in the games I missed posting. ESPN experts here and here.
Everyone knows the big story this Sunday, and I've spent a season of posts building up to this. There's no sense rehashing what's at stake. This countdown started way back in September. The post of 9/21/08, to be exact, was the first mention of a winless Lions season by me. Now, three months and a week later, we're on the verge of what seemed impossible then.
For some humor, read this article. It contains the single greatest quote of the NFL year.
Lions cornerback Travis Fisher is quoted as saying:
"I think we're going to shock a lot of people with a great game. I feel like we're going to win," he said. "Not to take anything away from Green Bay, but we're a great football team. I know the record doesn't show it, but I'm going to say it."
With this as evidence, I think we can all conclude that football players are truly delusional.
If by great, Travis, you mean that you're on the verge of the single greatest losing season in NFL history, then, yes, you are a great football team.
If by great, you mean great in a spectacularly bad way, then, yes, you are a great football team.
And, if by great, you mean a team that will stand in the record books for all eternity, then yes, you are great.
By the way, did I mention that I think it is entirely possible, even plausible, that Detroit may win today?
Atlanta.
New England.
Cincinnati.
Green Bay.
Indianapolis.
Minnesota.
New Orleans.
Pittsburgh.
Tampa Bay.
Chicago.
Baltimore.
San Francisco.
Jets.
Philadelphia.
Arizona.
San Diego.
Everyone knows the big story this Sunday, and I've spent a season of posts building up to this. There's no sense rehashing what's at stake. This countdown started way back in September. The post of 9/21/08, to be exact, was the first mention of a winless Lions season by me. Now, three months and a week later, we're on the verge of what seemed impossible then.
For some humor, read this article. It contains the single greatest quote of the NFL year.
Lions cornerback Travis Fisher is quoted as saying:
"I think we're going to shock a lot of people with a great game. I feel like we're going to win," he said. "Not to take anything away from Green Bay, but we're a great football team. I know the record doesn't show it, but I'm going to say it."
With this as evidence, I think we can all conclude that football players are truly delusional.
If by great, Travis, you mean that you're on the verge of the single greatest losing season in NFL history, then, yes, you are a great football team.
If by great, you mean great in a spectacularly bad way, then, yes, you are a great football team.
And, if by great, you mean a team that will stand in the record books for all eternity, then yes, you are great.
By the way, did I mention that I think it is entirely possible, even plausible, that Detroit may win today?
Atlanta.
New England.
Cincinnati.
Green Bay.
Indianapolis.
Minnesota.
New Orleans.
Pittsburgh.
Tampa Bay.
Chicago.
Baltimore.
San Francisco.
Jets.
Philadelphia.
Arizona.
San Diego.
Friday, December 26, 2008
A Grand Christmas
I really made a haul this year. Here's what I got. Hope your take was as bountiful.
- The popular CD "Led Zeppelin On The Pipe Organ." I gotta tell ya, 'Stairway' sounds awesome.
- I received a shipment of two tons of printer paper from recycled sources. Mine came with a certificate claiming my paper originated from all those World Series tickets the Cubs had printed. I shall gleefully print everything I possibly can this year.
- Since my favorite books are "pop-ups", I was glad to see I received Chef Gordon Ramsey's "Another Kitchen Nightmares Pop-up and Scratch-n-Sniff Book". Watch out for the slime mold that jumps out from under the stove surface. I almost gagged.
- A year's subscription to my favorite magazine, "Blogger Fancy".
- In keeping with the blogging theme, I got bobbleheads of all my favorite bloggers, including Lucy, Angus, TK, Barb, Rick, MarieN, Dan at NR, and DanUp. Now, whenever I read your posts, I'll just reach over and tap your head and watch it bobble if I like what you say. Don't worry, the guy I bought them from swore there was no voodoo involved.
- I received the rare and hard to find "Issues, Etc." home game. Which is great, because I always wanted to pretend I was Jeff.
- Although I didn't get "Treasury of Daily Prayer," I did get an anonymous gift- "The Rod Blagojevich Study Bible". However, I kind of found it offensive, actually, as it is littered with a healthy diet of F-bombs in the footnotes. But I do recognize there are a lot of people who find this way of speaking natural, so perhaps it will help clarify some things for them.
- I got the "Russian Roulette Travel Mug." This thing has 6 holes at the top, and you have to spin the opening to get it to work each time you want a sip. Trouble is, you don't know which hole works. If you guess wrong, it gets really quite messy. I've got coffee stains all over my new shirt. I'll have to start drinking more water in the morning.
Anyone get anything better than this?
- The popular CD "Led Zeppelin On The Pipe Organ." I gotta tell ya, 'Stairway' sounds awesome.
- I received a shipment of two tons of printer paper from recycled sources. Mine came with a certificate claiming my paper originated from all those World Series tickets the Cubs had printed. I shall gleefully print everything I possibly can this year.
- Since my favorite books are "pop-ups", I was glad to see I received Chef Gordon Ramsey's "Another Kitchen Nightmares Pop-up and Scratch-n-Sniff Book". Watch out for the slime mold that jumps out from under the stove surface. I almost gagged.
- A year's subscription to my favorite magazine, "Blogger Fancy".
- In keeping with the blogging theme, I got bobbleheads of all my favorite bloggers, including Lucy, Angus, TK, Barb, Rick, MarieN, Dan at NR, and DanUp. Now, whenever I read your posts, I'll just reach over and tap your head and watch it bobble if I like what you say. Don't worry, the guy I bought them from swore there was no voodoo involved.
- I received the rare and hard to find "Issues, Etc." home game. Which is great, because I always wanted to pretend I was Jeff.
- Although I didn't get "Treasury of Daily Prayer," I did get an anonymous gift- "The Rod Blagojevich Study Bible". However, I kind of found it offensive, actually, as it is littered with a healthy diet of F-bombs in the footnotes. But I do recognize there are a lot of people who find this way of speaking natural, so perhaps it will help clarify some things for them.
- I got the "Russian Roulette Travel Mug." This thing has 6 holes at the top, and you have to spin the opening to get it to work each time you want a sip. Trouble is, you don't know which hole works. If you guess wrong, it gets really quite messy. I've got coffee stains all over my new shirt. I'll have to start drinking more water in the morning.
Anyone get anything better than this?
Sunday, December 21, 2008
NFL Week 16
Last week I was 11-5, bringing my overall record to 144-78-1. ESPN experts here and here.
I missed officially picking the Thursday night and Saturday night games, which is okay, because I would have picked Indianapolis and Dallas. Thus, I would have ended up splitting the two games anyway. That's three games this year I did not pick, which I think is some sort of record. I would have won the first game I missed, so I would have been 2-1 in the games I didn't pick.
Fortunately, there are no more Thursday or Saturday games for me to forget. I remember growing up they used to start Saturday afternoon games in the NFL right after the college season ended. I miss those games. I always associated those games with Christmas trees and songs, because they always came in December.
The Bears are hanging by a thread. In order to make the playoffs, they have to win their two remaining games. Then, either Atlanta or Tampa Bay must lose their remaining two games and Philadelphia must lose one, or Minnesota must lose their two remaining games.
We're entering historical territory this week. Never in the history of the NFL has a team taken the field with an 0-14 record on the line. The Lions will be making history, no matter the outcome of today's game, just for that record.
No one knows how they'll defend that record today. Will they come out flat and put up an early lead? Will the pressure of a potentially spotless record finally get to them, so that they cough up a win? No one knows.
Will they choke at the end, and let a deficit get away from them, thereby eking out a victory? No one knows.
This I do know, however. If they win today, or worse, win next week if they're 0-15, you may never hear from me again. I don't know if I could ever recover from the trauma.
I fear the Saints today. They have nothing left to play for, since they are eliminated from the playoffs. Detroit has everything to play for, a perfect 0-16 season, and I fear they may choke under the pressure and actually win this game.
A perfect 0-16 is something I've wanted to see since 1978, when the 16 game season started. Despite many pretenders, no one has gotten this close of a look at it.
Since we all saw a team go 16-0 last year, this would be the perfect antidote to that anomaly. Anti-perfection.
Hey, Superman has Bizarro. Matter has anti-matter. Yin has its Yang. Why can't the 2007 Patriots have their 2008 Lions?
Cincinnati.
San Francisco.
New Orleans.
Pittsburgh.
Miami.
New England.
Tampa Bay.
Houston.
Denver.
Jets.
Minnesota.
Philadelphia.
Giants.
Chicago- Monday.
I missed officially picking the Thursday night and Saturday night games, which is okay, because I would have picked Indianapolis and Dallas. Thus, I would have ended up splitting the two games anyway. That's three games this year I did not pick, which I think is some sort of record. I would have won the first game I missed, so I would have been 2-1 in the games I didn't pick.
Fortunately, there are no more Thursday or Saturday games for me to forget. I remember growing up they used to start Saturday afternoon games in the NFL right after the college season ended. I miss those games. I always associated those games with Christmas trees and songs, because they always came in December.
The Bears are hanging by a thread. In order to make the playoffs, they have to win their two remaining games. Then, either Atlanta or Tampa Bay must lose their remaining two games and Philadelphia must lose one, or Minnesota must lose their two remaining games.
We're entering historical territory this week. Never in the history of the NFL has a team taken the field with an 0-14 record on the line. The Lions will be making history, no matter the outcome of today's game, just for that record.
No one knows how they'll defend that record today. Will they come out flat and put up an early lead? Will the pressure of a potentially spotless record finally get to them, so that they cough up a win? No one knows.
Will they choke at the end, and let a deficit get away from them, thereby eking out a victory? No one knows.
This I do know, however. If they win today, or worse, win next week if they're 0-15, you may never hear from me again. I don't know if I could ever recover from the trauma.
I fear the Saints today. They have nothing left to play for, since they are eliminated from the playoffs. Detroit has everything to play for, a perfect 0-16 season, and I fear they may choke under the pressure and actually win this game.
A perfect 0-16 is something I've wanted to see since 1978, when the 16 game season started. Despite many pretenders, no one has gotten this close of a look at it.
Since we all saw a team go 16-0 last year, this would be the perfect antidote to that anomaly. Anti-perfection.
Hey, Superman has Bizarro. Matter has anti-matter. Yin has its Yang. Why can't the 2007 Patriots have their 2008 Lions?
Cincinnati.
San Francisco.
New Orleans.
Pittsburgh.
Miami.
New England.
Tampa Bay.
Houston.
Denver.
Jets.
Minnesota.
Philadelphia.
Giants.
Chicago- Monday.
Sunday, December 14, 2008
NFL Week 15
Last week's 13-3 record and Thursday night's victory have left me at 134-73-1. ESPN experts here and here.
I can't believe we're at week 15 and Detroit still hasn't won. Way back in the first month of the season, when there were still a lot of winless teams, I thought St. Louis and Kansas City were far more creditable for running the table in reverse than Detroit was. But thanks to the always unforeseen injury bug, we're here where we are. Doesn't it feel great?!!!
There's no chance of a Lions win this week, so I can relax. However, the two most important weeks on the schedule remain a challenge to my nearly sane state of mind. I still think next week is the real danger left on the schedule. New Orleans, out of the playoff picture now with nothing to play for, must travel to Detroit, who has everything to play for. Folks, the more I think about it, the scared-er I get, so let's just drop the subject, okay?
I've got something to get off my chest- is there a worse, or more pretentious, show on TV than "Football Night In America"? It has all the smarmy charm of a cocktail party you really don't want to be at because you can't stand anyone in attendance. What has happened to Bob Costas? Yuck. Keith Olbermann. Yuck. Tiki Barber. Yuck. The more I think about it, the nauseated-er I get, so let's just drop the subject, okay?
Atlanta.
Washington.
Indianapolis.
San Diego.
Seattle.
Miami.
Jets.
Tennessee.
Jacksonville.
Arizona.
Carolina.
Baltimore.
New England.
Giants.
Philadelphia- Monday.
I can't believe we're at week 15 and Detroit still hasn't won. Way back in the first month of the season, when there were still a lot of winless teams, I thought St. Louis and Kansas City were far more creditable for running the table in reverse than Detroit was. But thanks to the always unforeseen injury bug, we're here where we are. Doesn't it feel great?!!!
There's no chance of a Lions win this week, so I can relax. However, the two most important weeks on the schedule remain a challenge to my nearly sane state of mind. I still think next week is the real danger left on the schedule. New Orleans, out of the playoff picture now with nothing to play for, must travel to Detroit, who has everything to play for. Folks, the more I think about it, the scared-er I get, so let's just drop the subject, okay?
I've got something to get off my chest- is there a worse, or more pretentious, show on TV than "Football Night In America"? It has all the smarmy charm of a cocktail party you really don't want to be at because you can't stand anyone in attendance. What has happened to Bob Costas? Yuck. Keith Olbermann. Yuck. Tiki Barber. Yuck. The more I think about it, the nauseated-er I get, so let's just drop the subject, okay?
Atlanta.
Washington.
Indianapolis.
San Diego.
Seattle.
Miami.
Jets.
Tennessee.
Jacksonville.
Arizona.
Carolina.
Baltimore.
New England.
Giants.
Philadelphia- Monday.
Thursday, December 11, 2008
A Nomination
If we have to support the auto industry now, too, then we ought to get to choose who gets to hold the position of "Car Czar."
In my opinion, there is only one solution. Oversight of the entire American car industry can only be done by those who know how to talk cars.
That's right, I'm talking about...
Click and Clack, the Tappet Brothers.
Call your Congressman and Senator today to support Tom and Ray.
In my opinion, there is only one solution. Oversight of the entire American car industry can only be done by those who know how to talk cars.
That's right, I'm talking about...
Click and Clack, the Tappet Brothers.
Call your Congressman and Senator today to support Tom and Ray.
Sunday, December 07, 2008
NFL Week 14
Another week of 10-6 and a win Thursday makes me 121-70-1. ESPN experts here and here.
Let's hope the Vikings don't let us all down in the pursuit of the perfect season for the Lions. What else does Detroit have to play for? Nothing. They just need to finish this thing.
If they survive today, then they reach 0-13, which is exactly where Miami stood at this point last season. That team then got a home game against a mediocre opponent and ripped our collective guts out with an OT win to ruin what would have been the first 0-16 year.
Fortunately, if today plays out the way it should, the Lions get the Colts next week, which means they'll be the first team to reach 0-14 since the expansion year Tampa Bay Buccaneers in 1976.
We would then enter unchartered waters the following week, which is I think the most dangerous game left on Detroit's schedule. A home game against the also-ran New Orleans Saints. Two weeks from now I may lock myself in the basement from anxiety and not come out until that game is in the books. I don't think I could stand the suspense of the continual game scores scrolled across the regional game I would be watching.
Chicago.
Minnesota.
Green Bay.
Tennessee.
Indianapolis.
New Orleans.
Giants.
Denver.
Miami.
Jets.
New England.
Arizona.
Pittsburgh.
Baltimore.
Carolina- Monday.
Let's hope the Vikings don't let us all down in the pursuit of the perfect season for the Lions. What else does Detroit have to play for? Nothing. They just need to finish this thing.
If they survive today, then they reach 0-13, which is exactly where Miami stood at this point last season. That team then got a home game against a mediocre opponent and ripped our collective guts out with an OT win to ruin what would have been the first 0-16 year.
Fortunately, if today plays out the way it should, the Lions get the Colts next week, which means they'll be the first team to reach 0-14 since the expansion year Tampa Bay Buccaneers in 1976.
We would then enter unchartered waters the following week, which is I think the most dangerous game left on Detroit's schedule. A home game against the also-ran New Orleans Saints. Two weeks from now I may lock myself in the basement from anxiety and not come out until that game is in the books. I don't think I could stand the suspense of the continual game scores scrolled across the regional game I would be watching.
Chicago.
Minnesota.
Green Bay.
Tennessee.
Indianapolis.
New Orleans.
Giants.
Denver.
Miami.
Jets.
New England.
Arizona.
Pittsburgh.
Baltimore.
Carolina- Monday.
Saturday, December 06, 2008
I've Seen This Post Before
Sorry, but every single "expert" is just on such a Florida and Oklahoma bandwagon, I felt it necessary to repeat this post, with just a slight edit or two.
Let the beratement begin.
I just have to do it.
I love swimming upstream.
It would be so wrong to do otherwise.
I'll probably hate myself Sunday, but it's who I am, so why fight it?
Sure, it would be safer the other way, but what fun would there be in caution?
So I'm going out on the ledge and doing what comes naturally.
I've got the Tide. And the Tigers.
A little "T. 'n' T.", if you will forgive me.
A little "T. 'n' T.", if you will forgive me.
Let the beratement begin.
Fun Football Saturday
If you like college football, today is your kind of day. And not just for the SEC and Big 12 championsip games.
It's the day of the Army-Navy game. Which goes a little beyond just a football game- it's an emotional event steeped in a deeper meaning than just a simple game.
Hat tip to Drudge for linking to this cool video.
Official disclaimer- don't try this at home.
It's the day of the Army-Navy game. Which goes a little beyond just a football game- it's an emotional event steeped in a deeper meaning than just a simple game.
Hat tip to Drudge for linking to this cool video.
Official disclaimer- don't try this at home.
Thursday, December 04, 2008
Sunday, November 30, 2008
The Rest Of Week 13
After a 10-5 record last week, and a 3-0 Thanksgiving, the overall record stands at 113-64-1. ESPN experts here and here.
Should have some cold and snowy games the rest of the way, making for great visual effects on television.
Buffalo.
Baltimore.
Indianapolis.
Green Bay.
Miami.
Tampa Bay.
Giants.
San Diego.
New England.
Jets.
Oakland.
Minnesota.
Houston- Monday.
Should have some cold and snowy games the rest of the way, making for great visual effects on television.
Buffalo.
Baltimore.
Indianapolis.
Green Bay.
Miami.
Tampa Bay.
Giants.
San Diego.
New England.
Jets.
Oakland.
Minnesota.
Houston- Monday.
Thursday, November 27, 2008
Thanksgiving Football
Perhaps the worst slate of games in the history of Thanksgiving. To make it interesting, they should have moved the teams around.
Tennessee vs. Detroit- The first game is the most lopsided. It lost all of its intrigue when Tennessee lost its first game on Sunday. Undefeated vs. winless would have been an interesting story angle, and would have created interest if the game was still on in the second half. Now it's just a one loss team ready to plow through Detroit.
Seattle vs. Dallas- Another potential snoozer. Ambien sales have plummeted this week in anticipation of the combination of turkey and the first two NFL games.
Arizona vs. Philadelphia- Okay, this one's a legitimate game with two legitimate teams. Which means one team will probably blow the doors off the other.
Here's what I'd have done if I was commish. Change the teams around:
Seattle at Detroit- give the Lions a shot at a win and us some of the most comical football of the year.
Tennesee at Dallas- Two powerful teams, with a Texas flavor- Titans used to be located in Houston. Remember those Oilers?
Arizona at Philadelphia- Like I said, this was already a legitimate game.
I'm afraid of a Lions upset today. Keep my dream alive, Jeff Fisher.
Tennessee.
Dallas.
Philadelphia.
Tennessee vs. Detroit- The first game is the most lopsided. It lost all of its intrigue when Tennessee lost its first game on Sunday. Undefeated vs. winless would have been an interesting story angle, and would have created interest if the game was still on in the second half. Now it's just a one loss team ready to plow through Detroit.
Seattle vs. Dallas- Another potential snoozer. Ambien sales have plummeted this week in anticipation of the combination of turkey and the first two NFL games.
Arizona vs. Philadelphia- Okay, this one's a legitimate game with two legitimate teams. Which means one team will probably blow the doors off the other.
Here's what I'd have done if I was commish. Change the teams around:
Seattle at Detroit- give the Lions a shot at a win and us some of the most comical football of the year.
Tennesee at Dallas- Two powerful teams, with a Texas flavor- Titans used to be located in Houston. Remember those Oilers?
Arizona at Philadelphia- Like I said, this was already a legitimate game.
I'm afraid of a Lions upset today. Keep my dream alive, Jeff Fisher.
Tennessee.
Dallas.
Philadelphia.
Sunday, November 23, 2008
NFL Week 12
Last week I posted a 10-5-1 mark. Weird to see a tie again. Before the dawn of sudden death, teams would sometimes tie 2 or 3 times a year.
Anyway, as Barb The Evil Genius pointed out, I forgot to post Thursday night's pick, so I can't take credit for the Pittsburgh win, even though I obviously would never have picked the hapless Bengals. So I'm still at 100-59-1. ESPN experts here and here.
And to catapult Cleveland to the playoffs, I won't pick them again this year. That is, unless they fall out of contention. That's because whenever I pick them to win, they always lose. So for them to have any chance at all, I'll stay away from them until they are eliminated from playoff contention!
Even at 0-10, Detroit keeps looking better and better. It's like they are not even trying to lose. I'm very worried they're going to win one of their last six games. Come on Tampa, keep the dream alive.
Tampa Bay.
Tennessee.
Buffalo.
Chicago.
Miami.
Jacksonville.
Baltimore.
Houston.
Dallas.
Denver.
Washington.
Giants.
Carolina.
Indianapolis.
New Orleans- Monday.
Anyway, as Barb The Evil Genius pointed out, I forgot to post Thursday night's pick, so I can't take credit for the Pittsburgh win, even though I obviously would never have picked the hapless Bengals. So I'm still at 100-59-1. ESPN experts here and here.
And to catapult Cleveland to the playoffs, I won't pick them again this year. That is, unless they fall out of contention. That's because whenever I pick them to win, they always lose. So for them to have any chance at all, I'll stay away from them until they are eliminated from playoff contention!
Even at 0-10, Detroit keeps looking better and better. It's like they are not even trying to lose. I'm very worried they're going to win one of their last six games. Come on Tampa, keep the dream alive.
Tampa Bay.
Tennessee.
Buffalo.
Chicago.
Miami.
Jacksonville.
Baltimore.
Houston.
Dallas.
Denver.
Washington.
Giants.
Carolina.
Indianapolis.
New Orleans- Monday.
Sunday, November 16, 2008
NFL Week 11
Bye weeks are over! A full slate of games today (well, except for Thursday and Monday night).
Last week's inconspicuous 9-5 record coupled with Thursday night's loss leaves me 90-55 for the year. ESPN experts here and here.
I'm tired of waiting for the Detroit Lions season to play out. It's too nerve wracking. No team has ever gone 0-16, and my fear is that I will never live long enough to see it.
I thought history would be made last year, until the Baltimore Ravens tanked and let the Dolphins win an OT game in the 14th game of Miami's season. Talk about gut wrenching.
That's why I don't have a lot of confidence in this year's Lions squad. I've seen it happen too many times.
In fact, the Lions have gone a lot deeper into the season winless than they have so far this year. I even think they made it to 0-12 a few years back. So I'm not a confident man.
0-9 is a long way from 0-16. There's almost two full months of football left. And even though they will have to face a string of above .500 teams the next few weeks, I remain doubtful about the realistic-ness of 0-16.
So I make the following rule change right now, if I was commish. Getting to 0-11 is an automatic "skunk".
Like in ping pong or in a friendly game of "21". You get down 0-11 and it's a "skunk". Game over. Season over.
Which means Detroit would only have to lose this week to Carolina and next week to Tampa Bay, and they'd be officially "skunked". No more games. Automatic 0-16.
Which would also mean we wouldn't have to be subjected to watching the Lions play the best team in the league, Tennessee, during Thanksgiving dinner.
So see, just one more advantage to my rule change. You can thank me later.
Atlanta.
Philadelphia.
Green Bay.
Indianapolis.
New Orleans.
Miami.
Giants.
Tampa Bay.
Carolina.
San Francisco.
Arizona.
Pittsburgh.
Jacksonville.
Washington.
Buffalo- Monday.
Last week's inconspicuous 9-5 record coupled with Thursday night's loss leaves me 90-55 for the year. ESPN experts here and here.
I'm tired of waiting for the Detroit Lions season to play out. It's too nerve wracking. No team has ever gone 0-16, and my fear is that I will never live long enough to see it.
I thought history would be made last year, until the Baltimore Ravens tanked and let the Dolphins win an OT game in the 14th game of Miami's season. Talk about gut wrenching.
That's why I don't have a lot of confidence in this year's Lions squad. I've seen it happen too many times.
In fact, the Lions have gone a lot deeper into the season winless than they have so far this year. I even think they made it to 0-12 a few years back. So I'm not a confident man.
0-9 is a long way from 0-16. There's almost two full months of football left. And even though they will have to face a string of above .500 teams the next few weeks, I remain doubtful about the realistic-ness of 0-16.
So I make the following rule change right now, if I was commish. Getting to 0-11 is an automatic "skunk".
Like in ping pong or in a friendly game of "21". You get down 0-11 and it's a "skunk". Game over. Season over.
Which means Detroit would only have to lose this week to Carolina and next week to Tampa Bay, and they'd be officially "skunked". No more games. Automatic 0-16.
Which would also mean we wouldn't have to be subjected to watching the Lions play the best team in the league, Tennessee, during Thanksgiving dinner.
So see, just one more advantage to my rule change. You can thank me later.
Atlanta.
Philadelphia.
Green Bay.
Indianapolis.
New Orleans.
Miami.
Giants.
Tampa Bay.
Carolina.
San Francisco.
Arizona.
Pittsburgh.
Jacksonville.
Washington.
Buffalo- Monday.
Thursday, November 13, 2008
Sunday, November 09, 2008
NFL Week 10
Another 8-6 record last week, and Thursday night's loss, leaves me at 81-50 for the year. ESPN experts here and here.
This week is the last week of byes. Seems like the bye weeks lasted longer this year.
I didn't ever really believe that Cincinnati was going 0-16. But having two teams winless at this point in the year made it seem more possible that at least one of them was going to pull it off.
Now my dreams are beginning to vaporize. After watching the Lions almost take the Bears down last week, and now with the addition of Daunte Culpepper, I for the first time doubt that the Lions are going to go winless.
Sixteen games are a lot to lose, and the Lions are as yet only half way there. Sure, they've played some really bad football, and they undoubtedly have lots of bad football left in them.
The problem is that the Lions do appear to actually be trying to win rather than trying to lose. Despite having a chance to have the worst record in the history of the NFL, they don't appear to care about it. And that's really troublesome, because not many teams even get the opportunity to sniff 0-16.
Instead of football immortality, they appear to prefer to finish in the depths of an anonymous 1-15 or 2-14 season.
And it may happen today. Jacksonville gave up Cincinnati's perfect season last week. They may as well blow it for the Lions, too.
It looks like everything is lining up for a Detroit victory today. And the fact I'm not picking them makes it all the more likely. Even though just a smidgeon of hope remains for a perfect season, I'm not ready to give up like the Lions obviously have.
Atlanta.
Chicago.
Jacksonville.
Miami.
Minnesota.
New England.
Jets.
Houston.
Carolina.
Pittsburgh.
San Diego.
Philadelphia.
Arizona- Monday.
This week is the last week of byes. Seems like the bye weeks lasted longer this year.
I didn't ever really believe that Cincinnati was going 0-16. But having two teams winless at this point in the year made it seem more possible that at least one of them was going to pull it off.
Now my dreams are beginning to vaporize. After watching the Lions almost take the Bears down last week, and now with the addition of Daunte Culpepper, I for the first time doubt that the Lions are going to go winless.
Sixteen games are a lot to lose, and the Lions are as yet only half way there. Sure, they've played some really bad football, and they undoubtedly have lots of bad football left in them.
The problem is that the Lions do appear to actually be trying to win rather than trying to lose. Despite having a chance to have the worst record in the history of the NFL, they don't appear to care about it. And that's really troublesome, because not many teams even get the opportunity to sniff 0-16.
Instead of football immortality, they appear to prefer to finish in the depths of an anonymous 1-15 or 2-14 season.
And it may happen today. Jacksonville gave up Cincinnati's perfect season last week. They may as well blow it for the Lions, too.
It looks like everything is lining up for a Detroit victory today. And the fact I'm not picking them makes it all the more likely. Even though just a smidgeon of hope remains for a perfect season, I'm not ready to give up like the Lions obviously have.
Atlanta.
Chicago.
Jacksonville.
Miami.
Minnesota.
New England.
Jets.
Houston.
Carolina.
Pittsburgh.
San Diego.
Philadelphia.
Arizona- Monday.
Thursday, November 06, 2008
Church Directories
Recently our family had our pictures taken for a new church directory to be published in the near future.
Ahhh- the church directory. Do you ever dig one out and just go through it and marvel? Especially the really old ones, where the old people in your congregation are actually in their prime.
It's also interesting to note the clothing and hairstyles. Some of it is quite hilarious.
So, what kind of response does the news of a new church directory have on you?
Excitement at the prospect of your family getting a low cost family portrait?
Perhaps fear- in anticipation of a driver's license type mugshot published in a book for an eternity of future parishioners to guffaw over?
Or perhaps, eager anticipation at the prospect of seeing your fellow members' laughter inducing portraits?
Who will wear the most outrageous clothing? Or the most mismatched? Maybe you.
Why aren't church directories published on church websites? Think about it. If you're looking for a new church, wouldn't you want to see what these people look like before wasting your time worshipping with them?
And if churches would post their directories, we could have a contest for "best looking congregation". In this day of church growth marketing strategies, I can't believe no one's thought of this.
On the opposite end of the spectrum, we could all get a kick out of e-mailing our friends with links to our goofy-looking cohorts. Admit it- you'd look forward to e-mails with "Get a load of these guys!" in the subject heading.
I also think the pictures in the directory should be full of surprises. There are few things more spectacular than getting a picture published in the directory with hidden jokes.
For instance, when I see someone taking random pictures at church to depict the "church life" of the congregation, I try to sneak into the background. I've kept a small squirt gun in my pocket the past couple of weeks just for these moments. It looks quite real from a distance, and when I jump in to the background, I discretely pull it out to make it look like I'm about to hold somebody up.
If no one notices me and one of the photos makes it in the directory, it should be quite a conversation piece for years to come.
I've also offered money to the organist's to wear capes when getting their pictures taken. There's nothing spookier than someone sitting at an organ wearing a cape. It's something right out of a horror movie, and would look spectacular in the final publication.
If this works, next time I'll suggest a set of fangs to complete the look.
I also think that all the proofs should be made available to everyone. People always choose the proofs that present them in the most favorable light to be published in the directory, and we never get to see the rejects.
The rejects should be made available for all to see. The most obvious way to do this is to have a big screen slide projector show at the annual church picnic. As the picnic is winding down, and it's getting dark, everyone could gather 'round the screen for some good old family-friendly laughs.
Okay, so now you know still another reason why I'll never be president of any congregation. But does anyone have any better thoughts?
Ahhh- the church directory. Do you ever dig one out and just go through it and marvel? Especially the really old ones, where the old people in your congregation are actually in their prime.
It's also interesting to note the clothing and hairstyles. Some of it is quite hilarious.
So, what kind of response does the news of a new church directory have on you?
Excitement at the prospect of your family getting a low cost family portrait?
Perhaps fear- in anticipation of a driver's license type mugshot published in a book for an eternity of future parishioners to guffaw over?
Or perhaps, eager anticipation at the prospect of seeing your fellow members' laughter inducing portraits?
Who will wear the most outrageous clothing? Or the most mismatched? Maybe you.
Why aren't church directories published on church websites? Think about it. If you're looking for a new church, wouldn't you want to see what these people look like before wasting your time worshipping with them?
And if churches would post their directories, we could have a contest for "best looking congregation". In this day of church growth marketing strategies, I can't believe no one's thought of this.
On the opposite end of the spectrum, we could all get a kick out of e-mailing our friends with links to our goofy-looking cohorts. Admit it- you'd look forward to e-mails with "Get a load of these guys!" in the subject heading.
I also think the pictures in the directory should be full of surprises. There are few things more spectacular than getting a picture published in the directory with hidden jokes.
For instance, when I see someone taking random pictures at church to depict the "church life" of the congregation, I try to sneak into the background. I've kept a small squirt gun in my pocket the past couple of weeks just for these moments. It looks quite real from a distance, and when I jump in to the background, I discretely pull it out to make it look like I'm about to hold somebody up.
If no one notices me and one of the photos makes it in the directory, it should be quite a conversation piece for years to come.
I've also offered money to the organist's to wear capes when getting their pictures taken. There's nothing spookier than someone sitting at an organ wearing a cape. It's something right out of a horror movie, and would look spectacular in the final publication.
If this works, next time I'll suggest a set of fangs to complete the look.
I also think that all the proofs should be made available to everyone. People always choose the proofs that present them in the most favorable light to be published in the directory, and we never get to see the rejects.
The rejects should be made available for all to see. The most obvious way to do this is to have a big screen slide projector show at the annual church picnic. As the picnic is winding down, and it's getting dark, everyone could gather 'round the screen for some good old family-friendly laughs.
Okay, so now you know still another reason why I'll never be president of any congregation. But does anyone have any better thoughts?
Sunday, November 02, 2008
NFL Week 9
We've arrived at the half way point. Last week I was 8-6, so I'm 73-43 on the year. ESPN experts here and here.
Last year at this time I was 71-45, 71-43 in 2006, so I'm doing a little better than the past 2 years. I have the same record as in 2005. There is a remarkable consistency to my picking I hadn't noticed before.
If I'm not ever going to get any better, maybe I'll just quit some day.
Naaah.
Hope springs eternal for an 0-16 season for our bumbling heroes, the Lions and Bengals. Both are favored to lose this weekend. No surprises, please? In fact, if the Bears lose to the Lions today, I may not come out of my house for a week.
Buffalo.
Chicago.
Jacksonville.
Cleveland.
Tennessee.
St. Louis.
Minnesota.
Tampa Bay.
Denver.
Atlanta.
Giants.
Philadelphia.
Indianapolis.
Washington- Monday.
Last year at this time I was 71-45, 71-43 in 2006, so I'm doing a little better than the past 2 years. I have the same record as in 2005. There is a remarkable consistency to my picking I hadn't noticed before.
If I'm not ever going to get any better, maybe I'll just quit some day.
Naaah.
Hope springs eternal for an 0-16 season for our bumbling heroes, the Lions and Bengals. Both are favored to lose this weekend. No surprises, please? In fact, if the Bears lose to the Lions today, I may not come out of my house for a week.
Buffalo.
Chicago.
Jacksonville.
Cleveland.
Tennessee.
St. Louis.
Minnesota.
Tampa Bay.
Denver.
Atlanta.
Giants.
Philadelphia.
Indianapolis.
Washington- Monday.
Friday, October 31, 2008
Wednesday, October 29, 2008
Got It?
Anagrams:
VIEWING A STIR
WESTERN VIDEO
MAYOR'S FILM TYPE
ECHO IN MUDDY LANE
IF TUNES DO SO MUCH
I AM A WEAKISH SPELLER
One is a writer of some note, born in the 1560's
One is a U. S. State - admitted in the 1860's
One is a an old '50s tune - one of the most recorded songs of the 20th century.
One is a '60s movie - set outside Salzburg Austria
One is a unique singer - he made the scene in the '70s
One is a Clint Eastwood movie - also from the '70s
Hat tip Brain Den.
VIEWING A STIR
WESTERN VIDEO
MAYOR'S FILM TYPE
ECHO IN MUDDY LANE
IF TUNES DO SO MUCH
I AM A WEAKISH SPELLER
One is a writer of some note, born in the 1560's
One is a U. S. State - admitted in the 1860's
One is a an old '50s tune - one of the most recorded songs of the 20th century.
One is a '60s movie - set outside Salzburg Austria
One is a unique singer - he made the scene in the '70s
One is a Clint Eastwood movie - also from the '70s
Hat tip Brain Den.
Sunday, October 26, 2008
NFL Week 8
I was 10-4 last week, for the season 65-37. ESPN experts here and here. It's hard to believe we're almost at the halfway point of the season.
By the way, I've noticed the weirdest thing on ESPN's website. Mortensen has his picks listed on the Sunday Countdown page and the Expert Picks page. And yet he has differing records on each page (69-33 vs. 66-36). How can this be, unless he is hedging his bets or someone is miscounting?
Detroit lost again last week, as did Cincinnati, leaving both hopefuls alive for a perfect season.
Cincinnati does get Houston this week, which is a possible win for them. However, I think they'll emerge unscathed.
The Lions should remain perfect with a home game against Washington.
Dallas should get honorable mention mention today. The next best thing to seeing a perfect 0-16 season would be to see a team loaded with talent and a prohibitive favorite self destruct and flame out spectacularly.
Tampa Bay.
Washington.
Buffalo.
New England.
San Diego.
Jets.
Philadelphia.
Baltimore.
Carolina.
Jacksonville.
Houston.
Pittsburgh.
San Francisco.
Tennessee- Monday.
By the way, I've noticed the weirdest thing on ESPN's website. Mortensen has his picks listed on the Sunday Countdown page and the Expert Picks page. And yet he has differing records on each page (69-33 vs. 66-36). How can this be, unless he is hedging his bets or someone is miscounting?
Detroit lost again last week, as did Cincinnati, leaving both hopefuls alive for a perfect season.
Cincinnati does get Houston this week, which is a possible win for them. However, I think they'll emerge unscathed.
The Lions should remain perfect with a home game against Washington.
Dallas should get honorable mention mention today. The next best thing to seeing a perfect 0-16 season would be to see a team loaded with talent and a prohibitive favorite self destruct and flame out spectacularly.
Tampa Bay.
Washington.
Buffalo.
New England.
San Diego.
Jets.
Philadelphia.
Baltimore.
Carolina.
Jacksonville.
Houston.
Pittsburgh.
San Francisco.
Tennessee- Monday.
Sunday, October 19, 2008
NFL Week 7
Last week, which was abounding in toss ups, I was 6-8, my first losing week of the year. I'm 55-33 for the season. ESPN experts here and here.
On the winless team front- two teams fell from the ranks of the winless last week. As devastated as I was with the Rams victory at Washington, I was overcome with ecstasy when I learned the Lions had dealt Roy Williams to the Cowboys.
When teams start dealing their star players, and their heretofore starting quarterbacks are out for the year, its always a good sign that a team is in the process of giving up. And if they've given up, then you have to believe an 0-16 season is not only a possibility but is actually within grasp.
Except there is one little problem this week- the Lions get to play Houston. I'll be biting my nails watching the scoreboard today.
After this week, the road to perfection gets much easier. In fact, they really don't have a bad team left on their schedule. I'm really starting to believe in them.
Our other winless team is flying under the radar. I have hardly mentioned Cincinnati going 0-16, mainly because I've believed there is no way that could even be possible. Could it?
Buffalo.
Chicago.
Pittsburgh.
Tennessee.
Dallas.
Miami.
Giants.
Carolina.
Houston.
Jets.
Indianapolis.
Washington.
Tampa Bay.
New England- Monday.
On the winless team front- two teams fell from the ranks of the winless last week. As devastated as I was with the Rams victory at Washington, I was overcome with ecstasy when I learned the Lions had dealt Roy Williams to the Cowboys.
When teams start dealing their star players, and their heretofore starting quarterbacks are out for the year, its always a good sign that a team is in the process of giving up. And if they've given up, then you have to believe an 0-16 season is not only a possibility but is actually within grasp.
Except there is one little problem this week- the Lions get to play Houston. I'll be biting my nails watching the scoreboard today.
After this week, the road to perfection gets much easier. In fact, they really don't have a bad team left on their schedule. I'm really starting to believe in them.
Our other winless team is flying under the radar. I have hardly mentioned Cincinnati going 0-16, mainly because I've believed there is no way that could even be possible. Could it?
Buffalo.
Chicago.
Pittsburgh.
Tennessee.
Dallas.
Miami.
Giants.
Carolina.
Houston.
Jets.
Indianapolis.
Washington.
Tampa Bay.
New England- Monday.
Friday, October 17, 2008
Scientific Inquiry
This is a question that has puzzled me for a long time. I cannot solve it myself. I go back and forth with it.
The TV series, George of the Jungle, was composed of three shorts, themselves continuing series. We had the title series, George of the Jungle, followed I think by Super Chicken, and then ending with Tom Slick. I might have the order messed up, though, as it has been so long since I saw an entire 30 minute show.
Each individual part had its own theme song, and they all were as memorable as they were catchy.
So, my question is, which tune is the best? My favorite show was Super Chicken, but I'm inquiring of the songs, not the shows.
George of the Jungle?
Super Chicken?
Tom Slick?
And for some laughs today, YouTube has videos of actual episodes. Crazy stuff, in the Rocky and Bullwinkle tradition.
The TV series, George of the Jungle, was composed of three shorts, themselves continuing series. We had the title series, George of the Jungle, followed I think by Super Chicken, and then ending with Tom Slick. I might have the order messed up, though, as it has been so long since I saw an entire 30 minute show.
Each individual part had its own theme song, and they all were as memorable as they were catchy.
So, my question is, which tune is the best? My favorite show was Super Chicken, but I'm inquiring of the songs, not the shows.
George of the Jungle?
Super Chicken?
Tom Slick?
And for some laughs today, YouTube has videos of actual episodes. Crazy stuff, in the Rocky and Bullwinkle tradition.
Monday, October 13, 2008
I Knew Something Was Up
Considering their track record, I wouldn't have let those people anywhere near me. But he did.
Too bad. He had a nice career going.
Too bad. He had a nice career going.
Sunday, October 12, 2008
NFL Week 6
Last week I was 8-6. I'm 49-25 for the season. ESPN experts here and here.
We're in week 6, and there are still 4 winless teams. I think we might see one of those teams get a win this week, but no more than that. Houston and Cincinnati have a shot.
But that's okay. I don't think either of those teams had a chance at running the table and going the whole season winless anyway.
However, the Lions and Rams should roll on this week. Unfortunately, on further review, neither team's schedule favors them going completely winless. In fact, the Lions get Houston next week.
St. Louis has no chance of winning the next 3 weeks, but after that they could sneak in a win somewhere. It's going to take some really memorably bad football for them to pull off the greatest achievement of my lifetime: an 0-16 record. An accomplishment no team has ever done since the inauguration of the 16 game season in 1978.
Oh well, we can all still hope. Until that final team ekes out a 1st victory, I'll root on. Come on, men. You can DO IT!
Tough week this week. Lots of toss up games.
Chicago.
Indianapolis.
Minnesota.
New Orleans.
Jets.
Carolina.
Washington.
Miami.
Denver.
Dallas.
San Francisco.
Green Bay.
San Diego.
Giants- Monday.
We're in week 6, and there are still 4 winless teams. I think we might see one of those teams get a win this week, but no more than that. Houston and Cincinnati have a shot.
But that's okay. I don't think either of those teams had a chance at running the table and going the whole season winless anyway.
However, the Lions and Rams should roll on this week. Unfortunately, on further review, neither team's schedule favors them going completely winless. In fact, the Lions get Houston next week.
St. Louis has no chance of winning the next 3 weeks, but after that they could sneak in a win somewhere. It's going to take some really memorably bad football for them to pull off the greatest achievement of my lifetime: an 0-16 record. An accomplishment no team has ever done since the inauguration of the 16 game season in 1978.
Oh well, we can all still hope. Until that final team ekes out a 1st victory, I'll root on. Come on, men. You can DO IT!
Tough week this week. Lots of toss up games.
Chicago.
Indianapolis.
Minnesota.
New Orleans.
Jets.
Carolina.
Washington.
Miami.
Denver.
Dallas.
San Francisco.
Green Bay.
San Diego.
Giants- Monday.
Friday, October 10, 2008
Every Time I Hear Your Name
No, not the song by Keith Anderson.
I'm talking about hearing the name of Blake DeWitt, the Dodgers infielder.
Every time I hear that name, I think of good ol' Lake DeWitt, AKA Ballpark Village.
All Star Game is 277 days away.
I'm talking about hearing the name of Blake DeWitt, the Dodgers infielder.
Every time I hear that name, I think of good ol' Lake DeWitt, AKA Ballpark Village.
All Star Game is 277 days away.
Thursday, October 09, 2008
We've Seen This Somewhere
The Dodgers were a team scratching and clawing its way to the playoffs with a less than stellar record. No one gave them a chance. The attitude was that they didn't deserve to even be there. Sounds like 2006.
And yet now they are in the NLCS against an NL East opponent supposedly superior. Sounds like 2006.
Their playoff lineup is much different than their everyday lineup most of the season. It is much improved. Just like 2006.
The supposed experts cannot see this, just like they couldn't a couple of years ago. They look at the team's overall record and judge it based on that. In a weird way, it's like they cannot see the trees for the forest.
In other words, they are much better than their record suggests. Just like 2006.
And I expect that the underdog will go all the way. Just like 2006.
And yet now they are in the NLCS against an NL East opponent supposedly superior. Sounds like 2006.
Their playoff lineup is much different than their everyday lineup most of the season. It is much improved. Just like 2006.
The supposed experts cannot see this, just like they couldn't a couple of years ago. They look at the team's overall record and judge it based on that. In a weird way, it's like they cannot see the trees for the forest.
In other words, they are much better than their record suggests. Just like 2006.
And I expect that the underdog will go all the way. Just like 2006.
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