I Have A Different Name For Her

How about "Lutheran Barbie?"

Lutheran Lucy has a couple of posts here and here about Barbie.

Which reminded me of the great GI Joe. He was every 1960s boy's hero. A military man at heart, he even bore a scar on his right cheek. And I'm sure he could kick the crap out of Barbie's Ken. In the late 1960s, they made him an astronaut. I remember I had the version below, complete with command module that seated only one. He also had a cool shiny aluminum foil spacesuit and a plastic helmet. In the early 1970s they jazzed him up a little and gave him a carpet of hair and a beard for special operations forces. Whether they ever made a Lutheran version, I don't know.





And in the early 1970s there was also Big Jim.


Big Jim was the athletic GI Joe. He didn't get involved in too many military escapades. He was an athlete. A fisherman, hunter, baseball player, football player, and basketball player. And a black belt in karate. He could realistically flex his biceps when you bent his elbows. And if you pushed a button on his back, his right arm would come down in a karate chop motion. He even came with a board to break.

It's strange, but the Barbie Camper (below right) looks a lot like the Big Jim Sports Camper (below left). GI Joe probably co-opted it from Barbie on some special-ops mission and repainted it. Then gave it to his buddy Jim. That Barbie was such a Commie.


The only thing missing from the pictures of these old toys is that funky vinyl/plastic smell. I love that smell to this day. Only a new car smell is as distinct as this.

I think the world ought to smell more like these things.

Bringing Out The Celt In Me

Or, actually, I could say bringing out the kilt in me.

I am quite easily entertained, a subject for another post. But this is fun for all. I got this from a post by the great Scot Karen at Peripetia.

It's the Tartan Generator.

Generate your own tartan! And, no, that isn't "plaid". Sometimes, just when I think the world's gone to hell, it redeems itself. What a great idea.

Since I am a Scott, I have a few choices in my particular clan. And if you're not a Scott, you can go here to find your particular clan's tartans.


A Scott Dress Tartan, my personal favorite.


Another Scott Clan tartan.


Scott Clan Red Tartan.


Another variation.


Another Scott Dress Tartan.


This is a Scott Hunting Tartan.


Scott Border Clan Tartan.




Another hunting tartan.


Wee-hoo! Excuse me while I go make me a St. Louis Cardinals Tartan. Then I'm going to make me a kilt. Will that be hard, seeing as I cannot sew?

No Admission Fee!

There's no excuse not to visit Be Strong In The Grace. TK has hostessed the Lutheran Carnival XIX in spectacular fashion. Although I don't know what the secret mysterious acronym XIX stands for, my people are working diligently to crack the code. I think it's Norwegian or something.

And if you are Norwegian, take note. This edition of the Carnival would not exist if it weren't for Norwegians. Or at least this guy in particular:

Mystery Lutheran Dude- You have to click on the Carnival link to find out who he is.

And if you already know who he is, then I know you know this guy:

It's Only Natural...

...Seeing as how I am an Over The Top Confessional Lutheran Blogger and all.

You Are Bud Light

You're not fussy when it comes to beer. If someone hands it to you, you'll drink it. In fact, you don't understand beer snobbery at all. It all tastes the same once you're drunk! You're an enthusiastic drinker, and you can often be found at your neighborhood bar. You're pretty good at holding your liquor too - you've had lots of experience.

What's Your Beer Personality?

Question Of The Day

Are squirrels that live in bad neighborhoods tougher than squirrels in the suburbs?

Since they live in mean places, I submit that they have more of a chip on their shoulder than the average squirrel.

For instance, the squirrels in my neighborhood run away from my car as its coming down the road. They run away from me when I walk out in the yard.

If I drive through a rougher neighborhood, I've seen squirrels stand up in the road and act tough, like they are daring me to hit them.

I keep waiting to see one with a cigarette, shades and leather jacket. Then I'll be convinced.

But even so, I've still never seen one tougher than this chick:

Scottius Maximus Celebrity Of The Month

Albert Einstein.



Hat tip to The Birdwatch.

Depressing Thoughts For The Weekend

The government run medical clinic in our town, which is for indigent patients, is a shining example of our tax dollars at work.

Today I called it to speak to someone about a particular patient of the clinic that I needed some information about.

After I got the requisite automated operator, I was able to navigate the options available using the keypad of my telephone.

I was able to talk to a person at that point. Unfortunately the lady could not help me with my request.

So I was put on hold. I sat on hold for approximately five minutes before the phone started to ring, to be answered by a different female voice. I am using the word answered loosely. Before I could say a word, I was asked if I could please hold. "Sure," I said. I wasn't in any big hurry.

That was 11:30 this a.m. After sitting another 5 minutes on hold, I decided to pursue another avenue of gathering the needed information, which took less than 2 minutes.

However, I decided I was going to conduct a little test. I had not yet hung up the phone with the indigent clinic. Instead, I put it on speaker, and went about the rest of my work.

By noon I was ready to go to lunch. My call was still on hold. I have a timer on the phone that keeps track of the length of the phone call. It was now over 30 minutes.

I decided to go to lunch, finish up some hospital work, and get back to the office.

Fast forward. It is now past 2 o'clock in the afternoon. I am back. My phone line is still on hold. I have finally decided to hang it up. After almost 3 hours on hold.

How this could happen is beyond my imagination. Every phone system I know of has a mechanism of notifying someone endlessly if a line sits on hold.

Well, who cares? You could ask that question. We all should care.

Because this WILL be healthcare in the United States. It is going to happen that eventually the government is going to take over health care. It WILL happen. Most likely in our lifetimes. And this is an example of the service we will be getting.

The reasons I say that are many, both big and small. But the main reason it is going to happen is because of man's selfishness. You see, we want someone to take care of us.

"I shouldn't have to pay for my healthcare."

For years Americans have looked to employers to provide them insurance. They never saw the hidden costs that were there. Corporations are now getting out of the business of providing coverage. Too expensive. And people are outraged, feeling this is something they are entitled to have. Why? Employers don't pay for your auto insurance. Or home or renter's insurance. Or your food. Or make your house payment for you. Why should they have to provide health insurance?

The system will reach a breaking point in time. And who is going to be there to swoop in and pick up the pieces?

Our politicians. With wild promises to deliver the impossible. And Americans will go for it in a flash.

And when the government runs the program, incentive to give excellent care will end. There will be no competition.

We'll have no choices.

Kind of like the poor people in my town, who have no other choice than to go to this particular clinic I write about today. God help them.

What Does It Mean?!!!

TK at Katie's Beer has set a deadline. For submissions to Lutheran Carnival.

I'm too embarrassed to ask what it means. So maybe someone out there can help me.

The deadline is Thursday at midnight. Central time.

Now, is midnight Thursday tonight at midnight? In other words, less than 6 hours from now. Or is midnight Thursday tomorrow night, leaving a little more than 29 hours to make a submission?

Okay. I have to know. So, I'll ask...Maria Sharapova.

Maria, is it tonight or tomorrow night?


"I'm not sure. Katie's Beer's deadline confuses me too!"

I know, I could just ask TK...but I just had to use this ol' picture again- it's served me so well!

Belated Congratulations...

...To the beloved Salukis! For winning the MVC tournament in St. Louis on Sunday. Now, on to the big tourney.

Just remember to chant "S-I-U, S-I-U" or "Go Dawgs" when you see them advancing in the NCAA tournament. There's still bandwagon room for everyone.

Here's to Southern Illinois University. One of the most beautiful campuses in America, and my kind of place. (I'm just a bit prejudiced). SAL-UTE!

Random Thoughts On A Gray Winter Day

- How many spider eggs have we consumed in our lives? Surely spiders have crawled in to our beverage holders at one time or another as they lived in our cabinets, and layed their eggs.

- I hadn't thought of these two in years, but recently something (I don't remember what) reminded me of two things from 30 years ago or more:
Ringo Starr's "No No Song" hit single.
Make A Wish morning children's show.
Both of these things were way-out '70s fare. Especially Make A Wish. Full of colorful mushroom-induced cartoons with hippie-speak folk songs. Crazy, man.

- Recently I saw one of the "Beatles Anthology" discs, I think the one with Shea Stadium's concert on it. Later on in the disc there is a video, one of the first videos ever, I'd guess, that was of the song "Paperback Writer". It first appeared on old Ed Sullivan's show. If you look closely at the video, I think Paul McCartney has a chipped right front tooth (which I think started the whole Paul's front tooth is dead rumor). But seriously, if you have it, check it out.

- If we had a Gilligan's Island cartoon, and a Star Trek cartoon, how come they never got around to making an Andy Griffith Show cartoon before Don Knotts died?

- How come the President is the only one who seems to be subjected to job approval ratings? We all should have job approval ratings. And they should be published in the paper.

- Better yet, let's have Blog Approval Ratings. Visitors to our blogs would vote on whether they approve of our handling of our blogs. It could be a daily thing. Have a real stinker post (yes, I know, that's quite common in my remote corner), and watch your poll numbers take a nosedive.

- How come the whistle is not used more often as a musical instrument? I only remember it in Donna Summer's "Bad Girls" and Led Zeppelin's "Fool In The Rain."

- And what ever happened to Donna Summer?

- Whatever happened to kaleidoscopes? We used to get one from time to time as children. I haven't seen one in probably 25 years.

- Anybody figured out how to have a blog-radio show yet?

- How come when you get to adulthood you don't have pizza parties or popcorn parties anymore? I used to love these when we had these at school.

- Can you show up for church 5 minutes before church ends and still qualify to fill out one of those attendance cards? Or is there a time limit on tardiness for counting a person's church attendance? What is the protocol?

- Wiffle ball, anyone?

My Gifts To You!

Ladies and gentlemen, for your Sunday perusaling enjoyment.

The only thing is, you can only pick one.

Okay, you can pick both, how the heck am I supposed to know? I just thought making you choose one would make this more dramatic.

Without further fanfare:

a) A photo tour of the new Busch Stadium, with 117 new photos courtesy of KMOV.

b) A virtual simulation of the new Busch Stadium through the eyes of those good ole programmers making MLB videos for PS2, courtesy of KMOV.


And if the links don't work, I'm sorry, Computerlish iz diffycult for me. Just click on KMOV here and look for it yourself. Must I do everything?

Important New Scottius Maximus Poll- Your Feedback Needed

I'm thinking of having a laughtrack on my blog. That way people can tell the serious from the not so serious posts.

Vote now.


Official Scottius Maximus Poll

1. Should this blog have a laughtrack?
a. Yes.
b. No.

2. If you answered yes to question 1, which of the following laughtracks should I use?
a. Click here.
b. Click here.
c. Click here.
d. Randomly use all of the above.


3. Should I share these with other blogs wanting a laughtrack?
a. Yes.
b. No.

4. Should I share these with our pastors for use when one of them makes a joke in Bible Class?
a. Yes.
b. No.



Phone lines are now open. And I live close enough to Chicago for you to vote early and often.

Bad News Dept. Part 2

The deaths of two more people who I knew but who never knew me have occurred that I don't want to overlook.



First is Curt Gowdy. Anyone who is over the age of 25 probably remembers Mr. Gowdy. He announced almost every important sporting event on television (World Series, Super Bowl, NCAA tournament, playoffs, etc.) in my life until I was a teenager. Kind of like Joe Buck will be remembered 50 years from now.

He also was the original host of American Sportsman. He was the voice of the Boston Red Sox. Voice of the NFL on NBC. Voice of the MLB Game of the Week on NBC Saturday afternoons. Member of the Baseball Hall of Fame. He even was at the mike for the famous "Heidi" NFL game. If there was a big game, you knew he'd be announcing. Conversely, if you tuned in and he was announcing, you knew it was the big game that week.

He was still on TV at times. I would still see him on ESPN Classic quite a bit. He had a great low-pitched voice, although his enunciation was sometimes not the greatest. The thing was, like Harry Carry, he sounded like a regular guy. He didn't have the plastic broadcaster voice typically heard today.

And like a lot of the older announcers, he not only sounded like a regular guy, he was a regular guy. He would spend time with people, talking with athletes, fans, or broadcasting wannabes. From all accounts, a class act in a world without much of that left.


And then we come to a one of a kind talent.

To say Don Knotts had perfected the art of comedic acting is like saying water is wet. It's too obvious.

Of all the television sitcoms that were ever on the air, I propose only two were as popular as they were because the supporting actors, not the show's namesake stars, really carried the show.

Both of those shows finished their last season on television as the top rated shows on TV. The first would be The Andy Griffith Show (supported by Mr. Knotts' "Barney Fife"). The other is Seinfeld (supported by Michael Richards' "Kramer").

Don Knotts portrayal of "Barney The Beast", "Fast-gun Fife", "Bernie", or whatever other name you might call him, was genius. And although he went on to star in several mildly successful movies, and in Three's Company on TV, he will forever be remembered as Deputy Fife.

Here are some of my favorite remembrances, of Barney, the SINGLE GREATEST character in TV history:
- Barney's malapropisms- kleptomenerac (kleptomaniac), compelsion complex (compulsion complex), Sigmund Frude (Freud), schizofreeniac (schizophrenic), Einsteen (Einstein).

- Quotable Barney:
[shouting to several prisoners]
Barney Fife: Now here at the Rock we have two rules. Memorize them until you can say them in your sleep. Rule number one: obey all rules. Rule number two: no writing on the walls.
_______
Barney Fife: The last big buy was my mom's and dad's anniversary present.
Andy Taylor: What'd ya get 'em?
Barney Fife: A septic tank.
Andy Taylor: For their anniversary?
Barney Fife: They're awful hard to buy for. Besides, it was something they could use. They were really thrilled. It had two tons of concrete in it. All steel reinforced.
Andy Taylor: You're a fine son, Barn.
Barney Fife: I try.
_______
Barney Fife: Man, we really packed it away, didn't we?
Andy Taylor: Yeah, boy.
Barney Fife: Fortunately, none of mine goes to fat. All goes to muscle.
Andy Taylor: Does, huh?
Barney Fife: It's a mark of us Fifes. Everything we eat goes to muscle. [pats tummy] See there?
_______
Barney Fife: Well, today's eight-year-olds are tomorrow's teenagers. I say this calls for action and now! Nip it in the bud! First sign of youngsters going wrong, you've got to nip it in the bud.
Andy Taylor: I'm going to have a talk with them. What else do you want me to do?
Barney Fife: Well, don't just mollycoddle them.
Andy Taylor: I won't.
Barney Fife: Nip it! You go read any book you ant on the subject of child discipline and you'll find every one of them is in favor of bud-nipping.
_______
Barney Fife: If there's anything that upsets me, it's having people say I'm sensitive.
_______
[Reassuring Opie after releasing a group of dogs to the countryside as a thunderstorm approaches.]
Barney Fife: A dog can't get struck by lightning. you know why? 'Cause he's too close to the ground. See, lightning strikes tall things. Now if they were giraffes out there in the field, now then we'd have trouble.
_______
Barney Fife: Boy, giraffes are selfish.
_______
Barney Fife: [angry] Oh, you're just full of fun today, aren't you? Why don't we go up to the old people's home and wax the steps?
_______
Andy: What are you doing?
Barney Fife: Gun-drawing practice, ten minutes every day. If I ever have to use this baby, I want to teach it to come to papa in a hurry.
_______
Barney Fife: Well, I guess to sum it up, you could say, there's three reasons why there's so little crime in Mayberry. There's Andy, and there's me, and [patting gun] baby makes three.
_______
Barney Fife: If only someone would just kill somebody...
Andy: Barney!
Barney Fife: Well, maybe somebody would come through town and if they was gonna do some killin' anyways, they may as well do it here.
_______
Barney Fife: They don't do things that way anymore. This is the Age of Science Know-How, electronal marvels. _______
Barney Fife: What's the matter, haven't you ever seen a man take off a dress before?
_______
Barney Fife: All I'm saying is that there are some things beyond the ken of mortal man that shouldn't be tampered with. We don't know everything, Andy. There's plenty going on right now in the Twilight Zone that we don't know anything about and I think we ought to stay clear.
_______
Barney Fife: [to a group of boys] Boys, when that steel door slams shut, that's the end of the happy days. No more fishin', no more ball playin', no more peanut butter sandwiches. [Door slams shut behind Barney]
Andy Taylor: [little boy holds out sandwich to Barney] No, No Leon; Barney can't have that.
Barney Fife: You're real funny, you know that. We ought to book you on one of those excursion lines.
_______
Barney Fife: [Andy and Barney are watching a sign painter] Ain't he got chicken spelled wrong?
Andy Taylor: No, it's right.
Barney Fife: You sure?
Andy Taylor: Yeah, it's "i before e except after c and e before n in chicken".
Barney Fife: [chuckles] Oh yeah, I always forget that rule.
_______
[Andy has told Rafe Hollister to try out for the musical]
Barney Fife: I'm surprised at you, Andy. They want people who have had musical training. Why, suppose they ask Rafe to do something he don't know? Rafe, if they asked you to sing a cappella, could you do it?
Rafe Hollister: No.
Andy Taylor: Hey, Barn, what if they was to ask you if you could sing a cappella, what would *you* do?
Barney Fife: Why, I'd do it! [snapping fingers in rhythm]
Barney Fife: "A cappella, a cappella"... Well, I don't remember all the words.
_______
(Barney) “Emancipation proclamation was a proclamation, is what it was”
(Andy) What was it about?
(Barney) “It was about Emancipation !!! What do you think it was about? Use your head man !! Its common knowledge” There was these folks. And how else was they gonna get themselves emancipated, unless there was a proclamation.” “So they got themselves a proclamation, and they called it “The Emancipation Proclamation” I’m surprised at you for not knowing that Andy !! And I’ll tell you something else.” “I’m even more surprised that you think I don’t know about the Emancipation Proclamation”
_______
Barney (about Ernest T. Bass): "He's a first class, grade A nut."
_______
The Preamble to the Constitution recitation by Barney cannot be put down on paper to do it justice, but I HAVE to mention it here.
_______
And, of course, my all time favorite, which I just refer to as "Barney's Bat Eggs:"
"I never did like caves. You know what you find in caves? Bats! That's right, bats! And do you know what they do? They fly into your hair and get tangled up in there and lay their eggs and you go crazy. All right, laugh! It's happened. Do you want a head full of bat eggs? I don't!" [Spoken at Lost Lovers' Cave].

Thanks to CoJoWeb's Andy Samuel Griffith, The Andy Griffith Show Episode Guide, IMBD, CNN, and TV Acres for all the quotes.

Ugh. Life marches on quickly to the grave. For us all.

Ash Wednesday

LENT! I don't know why, but I have always loved Lent, even though it is typically for our family a season of self-denial of some sort.

I have been reading a lot about Ash Wednesday and the Church Season of Lent. Lots of good reads on the blog highway, from this one at Aardvark Alley to this one at Cranach, to this one at Be Strong In The Grace.

The following is an excerpt from the wonderful daily devotion book, The Lord Will Answer- A Daily Prayer Catechism.



"The word lent has its origin in the same root as one of the German words for "spring," Lenz. As nature awakens from the death of winter, so the Christian finds newness of life in Christ, rising from sin's death.

During the 40 days of Lent, God's baptized people cleanse their hearts through the discipline of Lent: repentance, prayer, fasting, and almsgiving. Lent is a time in which God's people prepare with joy for the paschal feast (Easter). It is a time in which God renews His people's zeal in faith and life. It is a time in which we pray that we may be given the fullness of grace that belongs to the children of God.

Calendar: Ash Wednesday may fall as early as February 6 or as late as March 10. The dates for Lent depend on the date of Easter. Ash Wednesday is always 46 days before Easter.

Customs: Lent begins with Ash Wednesday, when ashes are placed on the forehead to symbolize repentance. The color for this service is black or purple. The color for the rest of Lent is purple. The hymns and services of Lent do not include the joyful word, "Alelluia." Consider fasting during daylight hours. Spend your regular mealtime in prayer and devotional reading. If you cannot abstain from food for health reasons, abstain from something else (e.g. television or another leisure activity). Do not fast on Sundays, which are not part of the 40 days of Lent. Read Bible stories with children each day."

Oh, that I could do that all the time. Repentance, folks.

Fat Tuesday

Mardi Gras. The day before Ash Wednesday. Which begins Lent.

Today is like a winter Halloween, in a way. A day preceding something special. I've grown to view both Mardi Gras and Halloween as celebrations of darkness, both fleshly and spiritual. Thankfully, I will not participate. Not through any power of mine, mind you, but because God, thankfully, keeps this part of me in check. As I have gotten older, I look at both as man's continual raging against the holy, and God himself.

In their pre-Lent letter to our congregation, our pastors put this in front of us.

"Jesus, knowing all that was going to happen to him, went out and asked them, 'Who is it you want?'" (John 18:4)

"And you? Who will you want- and seek- these coming Wednesdays and Sundays of Lent? Will the world and your flesh argue their priorities? Or...Him who gave His body and shed His blood for you?"

And you?

Bad News Dept. Part 1

Fair warning. Get your tickets soon, or you may not get them. Which may cause you to sit in the dreaded "rapture seats".



See story here.

The Chronicles Of Jupiter, Part 2

It looks like Tony LaRussa thinks he can challenge Pujols for starting 1st baseman. Either that, or he doesn't like what he sees from the corner outfield prospects, and is going to put Pujols back in left. Leaving us the only team with a manager/1st baseman.


If LaRussa is confident enough to call his shots like the Babe, maybe we should give him a chance...


...but then again, just one half inning of play made him look this tired.


Just look at our team. How can you look at the picture below and not conclude that they're World Series bound? Our opponents are surely cowering in fear, as their "suffering shall be legendary."

Anybody Out There Wanna Spot Me $59.95?*

*Plus $3.50 shipping and handling.

Available March 28th:



A MUST-have DVD.

"Filled with more than 17 hours of unedited, pure-Cardinals passion, this collection includes the complete actual game broadcasts."

Look what's in the collection:
*1968 WORLD SERIES GAME 1: Bob Gibson’s record-setting, 17-strikeout masterpiece
*1982 WORLD SERIES GAME 7: From a pre-game flip, to a late-rally, the Cardinals secure a World Series Championship
*1985 NATIONAL LEAGUE CHAMPIONSHIP SERIES GAME 5: The incredible, improbable, bottom-of-the-ninth, game-winning-homer by Ozzie Smith
*1987 WORLD SERIES GAME 3: Brilliant pitching and Vince Coleman’s clutch hitting spark a Redbirds victory
*1998 MARK McGWIRE’S 62nd HOME RUN: The magnificent crescendo of a mesmerizing race for the record; “Big Mac”, Mark McGwire’s record-setting homer began an emotional, unforgettable celebration
*2004 NATIONAL LEAGUE CHAMPIONSHIP SERIES GAME 7: This come-from-behind pennant-clinching victory was powered by the clutch hitting of Albert Pujols and Scott Rolen

Hall of Fame Induction Speeches: Bob Gibson, Lou Brock, Red Schoendienst, Ozzie Smith, Jack Buck;
Milestone Moments: Brock’s 3,000th Hit, Stolen Base Record, Albert Pujols’ 1st Major League Homer, 2004 NLCS Homers by Pujols & Jim Edmunds;
Rare Interviews: Tony LaRussa, Joe Buck, Scott Rolen, Mike Shannon, Jim Edmunds, Whitey Herzog;
Uniform Retirement Ceremonies: Bob Gibson, Lou Brock, Ozzie Smith;
MLB Video Archives--This Week In Baseball Player Segments;
Busch Stadium Final Send-off;
Interactive Menus;
Inning Selection

Click here to order one for me. Remember my shipping address:
Scottius Maximus
C/O Post Master
Boody IL Post Office
Boody, IL 62514

This Can't Be Good For Business

H&R Block-IRS.
IRS-H&R Block.

That's more awkward that Uma-Oprah. (Although personally I thought that was an awesome moment).

I heard on Paul Harvey's radio news show today that the great tax business, H&R Block, "misunderestimated" their own taxes by $32 million. Come on. Give 'em a break. It's not like they know what they're doing, right?

Tax preparers make $32 million tax mistakes on their own taxes, right? Like...like...like Supreme Court justices get thrown in jail sometimes, right? Like...like...hunters shoot other hunters, right? Like...ambulance drivers stop at Hardee's before completing the emergency run, right? Like fireman sometimes burn down buildings accidently, right?

How does the defense go on this one?

"Sorry, your honor, we hope you can overlook (wink wink) this one." No.

"Sorry, your honor, we weren't as good as we thought we were. I hope you can understand, we're in over our heads." No.

"Look, your honor, we're sorry, but we really have no idea what we're doing. Just please don't tell anyone about this, okay?" No.

"This stinkin' tax code is so ridiculous, judge baby, we couldn't figure it out. And we're "supposed" to know what we're doing." THAT'S IT!

New Ballpark Photos From New Perspectives

Thank you, cameraperson, whoever you are. This is awesome. From STLToday.


This is the view coming west from Illinois. This is the right field corner of the stadium.


This is a photo from south of the stadium and highway 40 looking northerly toward the same corner.


View looking southerly and slightly westerly.


Looking southwest. The right of the photo is where the Clark Street extension is going to pass through with the ball park village to the north.


Nice Hardee's sign, huh?


Light tower and scoreboard with Cardinals clock.


North of the new stadium looking back east toward the river. Ladies and gentlemen, the ball park village is looking quite prehistoric at present. You can still see where the old Busch's outline is.


Looking due east, this is where Clark Street will continue on north of the new stadium.



And if you'd rather watch a video of the new stadium, click here.

In The Year 2525 2006

When I was a little one, age 6, I remember hearing the song "In The Year 2525" by Zager and Evans and being mesmerized by it. I just loved it. As I got older I forgot all about it, until I heard it again on an oldies station 10 or 15 years ago. Then I thought it was good music with a kind of kooky theme.

Later I discovered the many websites publishing song lyrics, and I looked up "In The Year 2525". I guess those lyrics are fine. For 1969. But they need a little tweaking. A little updating, if you will. For the 21st Century.

And I'm just the ape to do it.

By the way, if you go to this website, it has cheesy "In The Year 2525" music playing in the background. But it isn't as bad as the background music of the Petals Around The Rose site linked to by World Magazine's Blog last year. Click here to listen to that. Rush's "Red Barchetta" on a toy keyboard? Are you kidding me? Vomit.


Anyway, my digression is over, and without further fanfare, here it is...

"In The Year 2525 2006"
Music by Zager and Evans. Words by Zager, Evans, and Scottius Maximus (with humble apologies to Zager and Evans).

(Slow)
In the year 2525
If our blogs are still alive.
If our words can survive, you may find...

(Kick up tempo)
In the year 3535
Ain't gonna need to speak, or in the morning rise.
Everything you think, do and say,
Is in the Blogger post you wrote that day.


In the year 4545
Newsweek's still keepin' Cheney's shotgun blast alive.
Hatin' on Bush, Number 43,
Hasn't stopped in 25 centuries.


In the year 5555
We're still laughing at the worst of AI.
Now the descendants of William Hung,
are gettin' flamed by Simon's offspring's tongues.



In the year 6565
Roman Numerals are finally pushed to the side.
MMMMDCXCIX is too lengthy
For that year's Super Bowl Trophy.


In the year 7510
"I Love Lucy" is gonna still be on then.
Look out for everyone, we'll all be crazy...
'Cause Barney's "bat eggs" become reality.


In the year 8510
Will the Cubs ever win it all, even by then?
In downtown St. Louis will Busch 3 still stand ,
Or will they tear it down and start again. Whoa-oh


In the year 9595
I'm kinda wonderin if Ablaze! will be alive.
Bettin' they're still short of their man-made goal.
Of "reaching" 100 million souls. Whoa-oh


(Slow down again)
Now it's been ten thousand years
I've made you cry a billion tears.
For a purpose I never knew,
Now my blog is through.


But through eternal night.
The twinkling of starlight.
So very far away.
Maybe it's only yesterday.


(Pick up the tempo again)
In the year 2525
If my blog is still alive.
If my words can survive, they may find...


In the year 3535 {fade}

How About A St. Louis Vacation This Summer?

Now that the ballpark is getting much closer to completion and its opening day only 47 days away (is that possible?), the next phase of development is coming in to focus. From KMOV, I "borrowed" some more pictures that show what the Ballpark Village Complex is being planned to look like.

First of all, looking northeast.


Looking east. The old Busch Stadium stood here, and the road, obviously, was not there. Moving to the east down Clark St. is where first base in the old stadium was.


Look at all the development going in there, north of the new stadium. What? You can't read all that?


On this wacky map, east is on top, north to the left, and so on, and so on.


I'm not sure, but it looks like something's on fire in the background. And is that the outline of a great pyramid back there?


I'm completely turned around here. Are we looking north from the galleria? Who knows?


This is a funky picture. It's supposed to be taken from one of the buildings in the village looking south onto the field, but the shadowy figures are freaking me out. Looks a little like those folks have been raptured or something. Weird color scheme, too, man.


I'm thinking of expanding Scottius Maximus Enterprises into the travel industry. I think my explanations would benefit most travelers. Right?