Saturday, November 18, 2006

The Worm Has Turned Again...On "The Mike Douglas Show 2006"

"Okay, we're back. And I'm pleased to welcome back to the show today that action ape, the primary primate, and childish chimp, Scottius Maximus. At the end of his first year of blogging, the world was sharply divided on what it all meant. So this November, Mr. Scottius has chosen 'The Mike Douglas Show' to celebrate the close of his 2nd year in the great blogatorium. Let's give him a big hand."

"Thanks, Mr. Douglas. Umm, where's Lisa and Eb?

MD: "Sorry, wrong show, Mr. MENSA."

SM: "Whoops."

MD: "So, besides avoiding what seemed to be certain cancellation, what do you consider your greatest achievement in blogging over these two years?"

SM: "Funny you should ask. Because I've written a song about some of my blogging accomplishments."

MD: "That couldn't have taken long."

SM: "About as long as your comb-over, Mike."

MD: "Would you like some accompaniment?"

SM: "Yes, sir, just as long as it's not Yoko."

MD: "Without further ado, then, here's Scottius Maximus singing "MY WAY"-- Wait a minute, wasn't that already a song?"

SM: "I've done some things to way. Get it?"

MD: "Oh, I'm afraid we're all about to 'get it'. Frank Sinatra would take you out if he were still alive. Gee, you're not at all self-absorbed, are you?"

SM: "Maestro?

("MY WAY", words by Scottius Maximus, sung to the tune of a song called "My Way.")

And now, it's been two years, and so it's here, my 'blogiversary'.
700 posts, but you'll see that most
Were really left forgotten.
Posts about me, H-G-T-V, Kirk's Kidney Stone, Barry Manilow.
And more, much more than this,
I did it my way.

Bad songs, I wrote a few
Superhero I...Superhero II.
Real Men Of Genius, you'd like to mute... 2-0-2-5, and My Blogs Salute.
I penned...Stairway To Hell. How could you miss...Castaway Mel?
And more, much more than this,
I did it my way.

Yes, UFOs...cartoon heroes,
Some bagpipe rock...and TV flops.
More Mt. Rushmores, and Mike Shannon lore,
There's Jacques Rogge...and Matt Foley.
Don't like it here? Then drink more beer.
I did it my way.

Old timer games...and Ozzy's shames,
The World Series; Tolkien allegories.
Such bad haiku, band names that blew. I have to that smell you?.
To think, I did all that, and may I say --- not in a shy way,
Oh no, oh no not me,
I did it my way.

For 'Random Thoughts', speeches uttered not.
And the Arch walk...some Pirate Talk.
I'm dateline dazed, but not Ablaze!
Why don't you see...I hate rugby!
Isn't it plain, that I'm not insane?---
I did it my way.

I did it- my way!"

(Crowd roars approval)

Thank you all! It's been a blast. I've "met" a lot of great people here and out there. Here's to all of you who've stopped by and commented...Lucy, TK, Barb, Quipper, Marie N, Des Moines Girl, Rebecca, Designated Knitter, Dan At Necessary Roughness, Angus G Van Halen, Aardvark, Ask The Pastor, Karen McL, Terrible Swede, Dan Up, Favorite Apron, FatherDMJ...and, of course, Anonymous. If I forgot you, forgive me...but you should comment more often, then!



  1. Happy Blog-o-versary! I look forward to reading more of your posts!

    Loved the song! ;-)

  2. DMG!

    Thanks! Right back at ya! It's nice to get comments like this.

  3. You've got a gift for putting tribute songs together, that's for sure. But the biggest gift you have is being able to put smiles on people's face, sometimes on a day when they really needed a good laugh. Every one of those posts you just listed made me laugh and smile. You blessed me with humor. Here's to the third year! Congratulations!

  4. Scottius!

    As always, a most excellent post. Happy blogoversary. May you have many more.

    Not only is your writing good, but your ability to resurrect Mike Douglas and Bon Scott this year was simply amazing. :-)

  5. TK!

    You may find this hard to believe, but your comment has left me speechless. Thanks for your kindness. You are also a blessing to our family.

  6. Quipper!

    Thank you. Say, don't you have a game to watch? Go Buckeyes! Let's hope 2006 continues to be a great sports year!

    And, if you decide to run for office, and if I promise to make references to Bon and Mike...ummmm...well, can I be your speechwriter?

  7. Cheers! And looking forward to many more.

    Yes, the Quipper did watch the game. He is frustrated it was so close!

  8. MarieN!

    Thanks. You are all so kind for reading my blog.

    Close? This wasn't "Boody State Junior College" THE OSU was playing. Tell Quipper this is no time to be frustrated! Be happy, and do the "Dance of Joy".

  9. Scottius!

    I added my Idiot of the Week column yesterday. I think you'll like it.

  10. Quipper!

    Nice column. Look forward to it every week.

  11. Wow... best. Blogiversary. Ever. Truly epic.

  12. Danup!

    Thanks. It's been one big party here. You are truly too kind. Now go and continue your Cardinals fan mission- party on, sir!